We are all governed by fear.
Even when good things happen, we’re afraid they will go away.
Once you accept and welcome your fear, it won’t have control over you anymore.
It’s about embracing the duality.
You have to be ok with the best outcome and the worst outcome.
Here’s the truth: you don’t have to live anxious and scared.
You don’t have to be governed by your story.
On today’s episode of The School of Greatness, I talk about increasing your receiving vibration with a comedian turned motivational speaker: Kyle Cease.
Kyle Cease is a New York Times best-selling author with two #1 Comedy Central specials to his credit. He has been a guest speaker at thousands of colleges, summits, and Fortune 500 conferences and has made over 100 TV and movie appearances.
Kyle teaches that most of our “triggers” are fears we have based on old stories. Once we dig deep to figure out where those are rooted, we can stop letting them control us.
So get ready to learn how to let go of fear on Episode 1399.
LEWIS HOWES: This is episode number 839 with New York Times bestselling author, Kyle Cease.
LEWIS HOWES: Welcome to the School of Greatness. My name is Lewis Howes, former pro athlete turned lifestyle entrepreneur. Each week, we bring you an inspiring person or message to help you discover how to unlock your inner greatness. Thanks for spending some time with me today, now let the class begin.
LEWIS HOWES: Lao Tzu said, “Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” This is going to be a good one. We dive in deep with the iconic, inspirational, hilarious, philosophical Kyle Cease today. And before we dive in, we are two weeks away from the Summit of Greatness where Kyle is speaking at. That’s right, Summit of Greatness, Columbus, Ohio. Almost 2,000 people registered from around the world to connect, to be inspired, to learn, to grow. We’ve got incredible speakers like Kyle Cease, Ed Mylett, LeAnn Rimes, and other great surprises. Make sure to go to summitofgreatness.com right now. Get your tickets because it’s coming in two weeks. We only do this once a year and when it’s gone, you got to wait until next year. So don’t wait and say, “Oh, I will do this next year.” Do it right now.
Again, it’s going to be an amazing time, every year is a bigger and bigger celebration. So many people have lifelong friendships, great business partners, relationships, things like that, and really start to take their life to the next level. So go to summitofgreatness.com. Come watch Kyle and many other amazing speakers and connect with some incredible people from around the world.
Now, if you don’t know who Kyle is, he’s a New York Times, USA Today, and Wall Street Journal bestselling author. He’s a comedian and a transformational speaker. He has two number one Comedy Central specials. And in addition to leading his own live events, he has spoken with renowned teachers like Eckhart Tolle, Jim Carrey, Michael Beckwith, Louis C.K, Tony Robbins, Deepak Chopra, and Marianne Williamson. He has been a guest speaker at thousands of colleges, summits, Fortune 500 conferences, and he’s also made more than 100 various TV and movie appearances including 10 Things I Hate About You, Not Another Teen Movie, Jimmy Kimmel Live, Comics Unleashed, and numerous VH1 shows.
And in this interview, we talk about how chasing something can mean you’re actually not ready for it and I talk about an important lesson I learned when I really wanted money and felt broke, and how it never came to me until I let that go. The important difference between a calling and a justification. Some things were called into and other things we justify doing. How trying to control others actually gives them more power over you. That’s right. That’s crazy, isn’t it? Creating space for money and how refocusing on yourself will actually bring and attract you wealth. Kyle talks about this and breaks it down. Understanding your value and the power of saying no. That and so much more. This is a game changer. If you really want to attract more wealth and learn how to believe in your worth, then this one’s going to be powerful.
Do me a favor, share it with one friend today. Make an impact on someone’s life. Someone who you might feel is stuck in their life or feel like they want to break through on money conversations or wants to earn more, or feels like they’re always trapped with the bills of life. Just text them this link that you’re listening to on Apple podcast or Spotify, or you can use the link lewishowes.com/839. Be a hero, be a champion to one person today. Just text them this link ,to one person, or you can post it on a WhatsApp group chat or post in social media and tag me and Kyle as well on Instagram. Let us know you’re listening. This is going to help a lot of people and I want you to be a champion in someone’s life today by sharing this valuable, free resource with them.
And before we dive in, big thank you to our sponsor, DoorDash. Now, you got to to treat yourself with the meal you deserve. Healthy meals you deserve, and have your favourite restaurants come to you with DoorDash. Now, you can always splurge on the unhealthy stuff, which I do from time to time, because DoorDash connects you to your favorite restaurants in your city and ordering is super easy. You just open the DoorDash app, you choose what you want to eat, and your food is sent to your door wherever you are. It’s crazy. Not only is your favourite pizza joint already on DoorDash. Trust me, I get lots of pizza on there, but there are over 340,000 restaurants in 3,300 cities, so you might find something new you’ll like also. And don’t worry about dinner, let dinner come to you with DoorDash. Right now, on this [INAUDIBLE] can get $5 off their first order of $15 or more when you download the DoorDash app and enter the promo code “GREATNESS”. Again, go check this app. I’m telling you, it’s super convenient, super easy, and it comes right through your door. It’s $5 off your first order when you download the DoorDash app from the App Store and just enter the promo code “GREATNESS”. Make sure to check it out right now, DoorDash app in the App Store. Use the promo code “GREATNESS” for $5 off your first order from DoorDash.
Big thank you to our sponsor today. And without further ado, let’s dive into this episode with the one, the only, Kyle Cease.
LEWIS HOWES: Welcome back everyone to the School of Greatness podcast. We have the caring comedian—I just came up with that. Kyle Cease in the house. “The caring comedian.” That should be your new tagline.
KYLE CEASE: I like that.
LEWIS HOWES: Even though you’re not a comedian necessarily anymore.
KYLE CEASE: I don’t care.
LEWIS HOWES: And you don’t care. But you care about people.
KYLE CEASE: I do.
LEWIS HOWES: You care about people’s transformation, you care about their freedom, and their personal power, I would say that [INAUDIBLE].
KYLE CEASE: Yes. Yeah, I think sometimes too much. But—
LEWIS HOWES: Too much.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah.
LEWIS HOWES: Does it hurt you when you care too much?
KYLE CEASE: What I mean by that is I could do the work on—I really believe that when we’re wanting something, anything in the world to change, I find that it actually is reflecting something that’s inside you that hasn’t been seen.
LEWIS HOWES: For example?
KYLE CEASE: For example, okay, there’s times where I will be in the middle. I do work with people and I can kind of see often when they have a deep desire.
LEWIS HOWES: For what? I want to make more money, I want a better relationship, I want to lose the weight.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. Or one that I see a lot is when they can’t figure out which way they’re going on a certain scenario, like which way should I do this.
LEWIS HOWES: You mean like a relationship? Should I stay in the marriage or get divorced? I’m not sure.
KYLE CEASE: Yes, right. What that dilemma means is you have a belief there’s a wrong way to do it. And if you think there’s a wrong way, like what does that look like? And what we find [INAUDIBLE] when I work with people after a long time, what they find is that the wrong way is I’ll go through something that I went through when I was five. In other words, there might be a part of you that’s controlling and trying to control a situation. Why are we needing the control of the situation? Because when you were five, your parents fought a lot and you were the one that had organized everything and you unconsciously picked up that they’ll divorce if you don’t. And now you actually feel like the entire world is going to fall apart if you don’t.
Most of the people I meet that really want to make money often have a major fear of not having it, which is weird because energetically, you’re putting out to the world “I’m scared of not having it” much more than “I want it.” This is a weird thing to say but when you really want something, you’re not ready for it. You’re not in the alignment for it.
LEWIS HOWES: So true.
KYLE CEASE: Let’s say you’re someone who believes who you are is someone who makes $20,000 a year. That’s in your story, you grew up that way. You heard sentences like “money doesn’t grow on trees” or “it’s the root of all evil” so you have these deep-rooted beliefs that you’re evil if you do this. So you have this thing going and that also is what drives you bizarrely, like you’re scared of that. So I work with so many people and if someone offers that person a million dollars, that’s death to the story of who they are. So weirdly, you’re going to be in this position where you want to take it, but you’re scared of it because it’s death to who you are. This is the reason I believe lottery winners go broke.
So the book I wrote is called The Illusion of Money: Why Chasing Money is Stopping You from Receiving it. Chasing money has a very different vibration than receiving it. When you chase something, you’re saying, “This is what I can see that I want.” And if you can see what you want, usually, it’s through the eyes of the ego because there’s so much stuff you can’t see. So you’re sitting here, looking through this tunnel, “This is what I want. I can see. It’s that one person, that’s the love of my life. I’m sure that’s my soulmate.” Meanwhile, you haven’t met almost everybody.
LEWIS HOWES: Right.
KYLE CEASE: It’s that much money, it’s that stuff. You can feel this needy vibration, and I’ve worked with so many people who say, “Dude, I don’t know what it is. I keep working my ass off, I keep trying to make money, and I can barely pay rent.” And [INAUDIBLE] thought, “What if—”
LEWIS HOWES: I’ve got no time, I’ve got no energy, I’ve got responsibilities, all these things.
KYLE CEASE: And what if those are the reasons you aren’t making any money? What if you’re working your ass off is actually why you can’t make money? And what if instead of working on getting money, you work on you and changing your vibration to lead the story that who I am is 20,000 a year? To lead the story that who I am is what my parents say. So if you go to a receiving vibration, the first thing you do is receive what’s here. I get it sounds corny, but we usually don’t pay attention to what’s here right now. Right now, you and I are here. Everything we think our story is, our accomplishments, our problems, our [INAUDIBLE] for just this moment.
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah, that’s true.
KYLE CEASE: And everyone watching this, if you really understand the highest truth of what’s going on, we’re all even. There’s no this person is better less and there’s none of that. We’re just the space that’s here. Now from here, you have skies the limit possibilities. But if it goes through the lens of who I am as this past story, this limitation, this person that tried to achieve it and failed, is someone who gets loved by failing over and over, or someone who has to stay small—
LEWIS HOWES: So you [INAUDIBLE] by failing, right?
KYLE CEASE: Right.
LEWIS HOWES: Because people start to say, “Oh, you’re going to be okay, I’m going to help you. I’m going to give you more time or money or attention because you’re not succeeding.”
KYLE CEASE: You get all this. Exactly.
LEWIS HOWES: People give you handouts or support you when you’re failing.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah, you get a lot of love when you’re failing. There’s a lot of people that will connect you, there’s a lot of people. And so we’re going “if I become something, I won’t get that sense of connection that felt like my mom. That connection that I get with my friends or that person that I dated that actually weirdly feels familiar to my childhood that I now associate this is love.” Meanwhile, the truth of you is this space right here. This sounds really weird, but this space right here contains all kinds of ideas. It’s almost like we’re an antenna and we can pick this space up and just sit and receive first of all, the idea that we’re enough. What if there is no purpose to chase and you are purpose? Just by existing? What if you can’t get out of purpose? What if that’s not a thing to chase? So that’s the first thing. Just so, okay, I’m in purpose.
LEWIS HOWES: Yep. You are purpose.
KYLE CEASE: And then that, the first thing that happens is that scarce, the part of you that says, “no,” I’m sure people watching this right now will go, “Oh, he doesn’t know my story.” Yeah, but that’s your story, which is past. So it’s fictional because there’s no such thing as the past. So everything about you that you perceive about yourself based on past evidence is bullshit. Everything. Your family history, everything. It matters, and it needs to be seen and loved and honored. We don’t repress it, but you’re the space right here that contains infinite possibilities and the space for that past.
So when you realize that you’re just this moment right here, and then do the actual work of connecting to it. See, most of us connect to the stories and connect to everyone’s addictions online and connect to the problems. But what if you actually pay attention to this? I spent two years, two hours a day, listening to silence. All my old stories show up and they’re like, “Oh, god, I can’t just meditate for two hours. This is crazy.” And then they leave and I’m just here, and there’s this silence that you hear. And after the silence is showing up, eventually, it holds space for billion dollar ideas. Like crazy possibilities and the party that thinks I would never be able to do that because my parents said this is gone, so it’s very easy to receive those ideas. So to me, what I find is that the more I can see what I want, the more it’s looking through the ego like lens. And when I just go, “I don’t have any idea what I want, I’m just going to move moment to moment, doing what I perceive is the highest vibration thing that connects me to the space for real,” then you can hear. Then they’ll just give you one step. It just gives you, “Go for a walk.” That’s a leap. Because usually, we’re like, “Yeah, but I need to look at my phone for—”
LEWIS HOWES: You got to work.
KYLE CEASE: Right? That’s your old story that says, “Every ‘yeah, but’ is an old story. Every ‘I can’t because’ is an old story.” It’s not including the possibilities of different frequencies that are trying to reach you right here. You’re looking through the lens of your limitation, so we can see it in little doses when you have those first moments show up that go, “What if you started a band or moved to Italy right now?” And then you immediately access something in you that made you able to hear that, but it’s bigger than the story of what you think you are. So you immediately have to come up with the, “Why? That would be ridiculous” to explain why you’re ignoring your body. So a rule that I have is everytime I’m justifying anything, I know it’s not my highest calling. Like that friend treated me like crap that one time, but they were really nice before. If I’m doing that, I’m coming with the reason to explain why I’m enduring my heart.
LEWIS HOWES: Justifying it.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah.
LEWIS HOWES: It’s like why women who are in relationships, or men, I guess. But you hear a lot of women [INAUDIBLE] say, “Well, he emotionally abuses me, physically abuses me, but he’s there for me sometimes when I need him” or something. There’s a “but”, right? “But he’s a good person inside, he’s just messed up.” Or whatever it is.
KYLE CEASE: Right.
LEWIS HOWES: “He’s the father of my kids.”
KYLE CEASE: That to me, right there, is the difference between a calling because a calling, you don’t justify. I have a two year old daughter and I never say, “Well, she gets good medical insurance, that’s why I keep her.” Why I do this for a living, there’s just no explanation for it. But we all know what it’s like to have a job and be like, “Eventually, they’re going to promote me.” You’re explaining why you’re ignoring your body and your body contains all the next steps. And when you do something that doesn’t move you from the highest you, you cut off the higher level of ideas, the impact on the world, the connection to the moment, and you’re saying out loud, “I’m this old story.” So you stay in the boundaries of the old story by staying in that stagnant story, that stagnant relationship, that stagnant job, the place you don’t want to live anymore. So I’ve been working with people a lot and watching them have these moments where they go, “Well, I’d like to live here, but—” And I go, “Let’s go. I want to do this, let’s go.” We don’t know what’s coming here. You’re only scared and I think I said this on your other podcast, but you’re only scared because you can measure what you will lose. You can’t see what you’ll gain.
LEWIS HOWES: Game changer.
KYLE CEASE: And a thing I always think of is imagine if Michael Jordan or Michael Jackson or Oprah had enough justification to stay in a mediocre job in 1981. So here’s Michael Jackson and he works as a manager at Applebee’s and you’re sitting here, seeing this talent in him and you’re trying to tell him, “Dude, you should do other stuff.” He’s wearing one-oven mitt. “Why do I want one oven mitt?” And you’re like, “I can feel an artist here.” And he’s like, “I’d love to, but I got to make money. Applebee’s is going to promote me,” and you’re like, “Dude, you’re going to make money, I swear to God. There’s millions in this.” And he’s like, “I know, I hear your fantasy. That’s really cute. I get it, I could be magical, but I’m realistic.” And they call that realistic. That’s not realistic. How many times [INAUDIBLE] events and go, “Dude, that’s great, Kyle, but I got to live in the real world.” And I go, “What’s the real world?”
And you know what it is? It’s when they sit at home and come up with all the ways that shit’s going to go wrong, which is actually delusion and fantasy and fear. That’s not the real world. What’s real right now, both our hearts are beating, there’s a space here. This is the only thing real. People watching your breathing, this is the only thing true. And we call this a [INAUDIBLE] and stressing all day and worrying about all the crap the news hand selected to make you freak out is called the real world. Do you know how not scary the world actually is? Like if you go outside, it’s not just horror and what it looks like on the news. That’s real. There’s a lot of buildings not on fire today that the news isn’t focused on. You can just drive down the street.
LEWIS HOWES: Because there’s a lot of people that aren’t being shot at today.
KYLE CEASE: There’s a lot of families that went to bed safe and woke up in the morning, and no one cares because we go, “This dark world is the only world.” And I’m not saying that’s not there. That’s there and it needs to be honoured, but in saying that’s the world, we’re denying everything that’s right in front of us including the space that has all the information, the source. Whatever you want to call it. Some people call it God, some people call it the Universe, you can call it your intuition. I don’t care if you’re atheist or Christian or whatever. This moment we all have, this is true and then we never pay attention to it. We’re crazy. And when you start meditating and listening to the silence, you see all these people that are just running themselves and you just see it like this crazy illness. And then you’re sitting here with all these insights. What if I create that? Boom, million dollar idea. This thing, this thing. And you’re so fulfilled by the calling that when you do create money, you don’t blow it on a bunch of addictions which you only have because you’re so out of alignment with yourself.
The only reason we have addictions is because we aren’t connected to ourself. So here’s all these people that are drinking and overeating and then have to spend more money at the hospitals because they’re overeating out of alignment, then they go to a job that they hate, spend eight hours hating it, go home, hate that, watch Netflix all day. And then overeat, go through the addictions again, buy the most expensive car to try to get laid.
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] fulfilled to have self-worth, yeah.
KYLE CEASE: And then here you actually are. If you connect to this moment, not to be a cliché, but the Internet is I’m sure [INAUDIBLE] or something.
LEWIS HOWES: The internet—
KYLE CEASE: This is real. And so what this book is about, and this is the proof. I promise, the copy the copy you’ll get is a professional one. But the book is about we are so focused on making money, almost every thought we have. “You see, but I got to get rent paid next month, I got to—” and we’re sacrificing our soul for it. And my question is, instead of throwing away our soul for the guarantee of the illusion of money—
LEWIS HOWES: Or illusion of safety—
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. A lot of people believe money equals safety. Yet, I can think of people that were broke, then made millions of dollars and thought, “What if I lose it?” So they didn’t feel safe. Or freedom, what if I lose this? So you’re under the illusion that freedom is outside of you. Just by saying money equals freedom, you’re implying you’re not freedom.
LEWIS HOWES: Or you need to have something to have freedom. Something external.
KYLE CEASE: So what’s the real truth? In my eyes, you’re just freedom, but you’ve created an unnecessary route to get to what you are. So you said, “Finally.” When I see a million dollars, you cut off the freedom that you are or when I finally fall in love, you cut it all off. And then when I get it, now I can feel, I can give myself permission to feel the thing that I could’ve felt in the first place.
LEWIS HOWES: The whole time. The whole ten year journey toward to get there, wherever it was.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. I put my own connection to source myself whatever on the other end of this achievement. Now my question is, what if you reverse that? What if you just start feeling the freedom that you are? What if you start feeling in love? What if you start feeling the feeling because that actually is our natural state? I think Eckhart Tolle once said, “Falling in love is the real you because it’s the absence of you wanting something. It’s the absence of you thinking something will make you happy.” You finally have a moment where you don’t think you need something to be happy, so your giddiness has nothing to do with the person. It has to do with that you finally decided you’re enough.
LEWIS HOWES: Or you love yourself.
KYLE CEASE: Right.
LEWIS HOWES: I’m in love with me.
KYLE CEASE: It can’t be the person because a month later, you could not feel that same way about them. So if that person is what made you feel in love—
LEWIS HOWES: You’re screwed if you need someone else to make you happy, you need someone else to make you feel in love.
KYLE CEASE: Right.
LEWIS HOWES: If that’s [INAUDIBLE] If you’re always needing that. [INAUDIBLE] add the feeling of love, add the feeling of happiness and joy. It shouldn’t be the reliant thing as to the other person.
KYLE CEASE: Imagine if you get to a place where you’re whole, where you get that you’re whole. Where all of the voids that you’ve created in yourself by living on social media, you instead fill them yourself. You fill them yourself, you actually say goodbye and cry out the old story that who you are is what your parents told you, that you’re trying to get love through the conditional way that your parents gave you in the ‘70s. You cry that [BEEP] out—
LEWIS HOWES: I was born in the ‘80s, but yeah.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah, well, I’m trying to keep your average audience, I don’t know. Whatever it was. You cry that out and you’re just left with you. You feel this place. By the way, first thing, you’ve never end up in a relationship with someone who’s codependent on you or needy or people pleasing, or take her from you because you can see through it, because you’re not codependent on them.
LEWIS HOWES: That’s true.
KYLE CEASE: So then you have someone who also did that work, and now you got 1 + 1 = infinity versus ½ + ½ = ¼.
LEWIS HOWES: It’s an amazing feeling because I’m in a relationship now that is that. I was telling you about [INAUDIBLE]. It’s just like, “Man, it’s just a different feeling.”
KYLE CEASE: Yes.
LEWIS HOWES: And I’m also not afraid to lose it. It’s the first time, it’s been crazy because it’s long distance and we’re both like, “Man, this is so magical.” And every now and then she would be like, “I’m a little scared of moving to LA and being together. What if it doesn’t work?” And I’m like, “You’re going to be fine and I’m going to be fine.” You have tons of men that are hitting on you all the time who are super successful and inspiring and loving and caring. Like, you’re going to be fine. And I’ve got tons of women who are amazing in my life. I’ll be fine. It’s going to suck, it’s going to hurt, it’s going to be sad, and then we’re both going to be fine. And that’s the truth. This is the first time I haven’t been so weird. It’s the first time, I’m 36, it’s the first time I haven’t been jealous in any relationship and it’s probably the girl I should be the most insecure and jealous of, because she’s a massive celebrity. She’s one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever met. She’s got every big celebrity male hitting on her all the time, billionaire, everything. But I have zero jealousy. It’s weird. Maybe because I’ve just killed my old self, that needed—I don’t know, some validation or something or security. I’m just like, “If it doesn’t work, I’m going to be okay.”
KYLE CEASE: Wouldn’t that be a concept?
LEWIS HOWES: It’s amazing.
KYLE CEASE: Wouldn’t it be a concept to be like, “I don’t need anything from you. I love you because I love myself, and I just want to be the highest choice so you choose to be with me, versus we made a deal six years ago so you better not.” Do you hear that, the difference? One is control, one is fear. “You better not. We set our vows ten years ago.” That’s control, that’s codependent and you’re moving based on fear, so you have no idea what your heart feels, you have no idea what you want. Everything is just “don’t screw up something.” And the idea that you could also just go to a place where you continually connect to yourself, you meditate, you make your highest moves, you let go of the things that feel heavy in your life, you actually become the highest value for this other person so they choose to commit to you.
LEWIS HOWES: Everyday.
KYLE CEASE: Because you’re the best choice.
LEWIS HOWES: Exactly. Not that they have to or they’re forced to or because they’re married and society tells you you need to stay together or whatever it may be.
KYLE CEASE: Correct. Like I love you no matter what you do. That’s the most powerful thing in the world. Someone once said to me once—he was talking to me, it goes, “I just have the hardest time trusting women.” And I said, “What is trusting for you that they do what you decide?” Trusting to most people means they better not do what I’ve decided they can’t do.
LEWIS HOWES: An expectation.
KYLE CEASE: It’s expectation and it’s control. How about, “I trust you to unfold how you need to”? “How about I trust you to love what you need to love, I trust you to go through whatever experience you need to go with, I trust you to follow your heart, and I’m going to be here loving you all the way, no matter what you do.”
LEWIS HOWES: That’s big.
KYLE CEASE: Could you imagine the power of that for you to be able to say that to someone? “I trust you all the way. I love you and you’re unfolding. You do what you need to do and I’m here because that’s called love for real.” Everything else that we’ve defined as love is attachment—
LEWIS HOWES: Control, manipulation.
KYLE CEASE: It is. And in controlling anyone, you’re totally controlled. I remember reading a book once that said, “Imagine you have a donkey on a rope. Like this is your donkey.” This was an old book, so they used donkey as the example. You have your camel and then it said, “Well realize now, you’re stuck on the other end of the rope. So here you are saying you’re mine, but now I’m stuck to you. So my life is “don’t do.” So now I can’t flow either. So the more you try to control anyone in a relationship, the more you try to control what they do, whatever, the more you’re controlled. Because your focuses don’t do and basically what you’re saying is, “Don’t do what I felt in the past.”
LEWIS HOWES: That hurt me in the past.
KYLE CEASE: Because everytime we control anyone or control anything or control any scenario, we’re scared to have a scenario that we unconsciously we don’t understand is in our body.
LEWIS HOWES: And what I’m hearing you say is when we try to control someone else’s freedom, we’re not free either.
KYLE CEASE: Completely. How could you be?
LEWIS HOWES: War prisoner?
KYLE CEASE: Yes. So take that all the way. If you’re scared of what people will say about you, they’re hand—every person that talk shit about us is handing us their power. Every person that talk shit about any person, do you hear that? They’re handing you their power. When you’re worried about what they’d say, when Marianne said something on the debates and everyone was writing about it, she has all of their power. She doesn’t look like [INAUDIBLE] she’s trying to give them their power and everyone’s [BEEP] because she’s breaking through [BEEP] in her body no matter what it is. When you are controlling someone, they have your power. When you’re telling them what to do, when you’re talking shit about someone, they have their power. They have your power. Everyone has your power.
LEWIS HOWES: So just be a monk in the woods, in the mountains.
KYLE CEASE: Well, one thing that was a huge hinge is realizing there’s no competition and everyone in my life, I want them to succeed. It makes me really powerful.
LEWIS HOWES: That’s [INAUDIBLE] able to last. I would say four years because my whole life as an athlete was, I need to win and second place means I’m not lovable. Second, third, last place.
KYLE CEASE: To a parent? Or did your dad teach you that or something?
LEWIS HOWES: No. I just think like—no one taught me that. My parents were always supportive. They wanted us to compete, but they weren’t like, “You suck if you’re second.” They were the most loving.
KYLE CEASE: Did you experience psychotrauma in your past when you were second or see someone make fun of something?
LEWIS HOWES: I was always just made fun of, so I was like, “I’m going to prove everyone wrong, and I’m going to be the best so they can’t laugh at me anymore.” I was picked last on a team, actually, when I was in 4th grade. I was picked last in school. Our class did a dodge ball for recess, played a game, and there was two captains in the class. And they picked all the boys first and they picked all the girls second, and then they picked me last. I remember being like, “Never again will I be picked last.”
KYLE CEASE: So do you see even though it was successful and killed it and you did amazing, that’s still fear of feeling something is your driver. Now I’m a huge fan of that, and there’s a higher even [INAUDIBLE]. Because if our driver is not to be bullied again on junior high, that’s nice, but what happens if you just go up? You don’t have to create this. So ego does that, ego creates a sabotage and it overcomes the sabotage it created. That’s what ego does. It goes, “I got to create a problem so I’m going to find the shittiest friend and then overcome that.” Or, “Life is about achieving so I got to overcome, but I have to have a problem to overcome.” So what if you just don’t have any problems as much by—I mean, so they show up. But we just go up versus down and back up to mediocre again. You’re not mediocre, you’re profound, but—
LEWIS HOWES: It took a while to learn that and I realized [INAUDIBLE] thirty, it’s when I started to do all the inner work when I hit thirty. I was open about being sexually abused as a kid and all these other traumas I had. I finally started talking about them and expressing them and letting them kind of released through my body. And it was those years after, last six years which has been like, “Wow, I’ve been such a jerk.” Not in a deliberate way, but like a subconscious way and unconscious way where all I wanted to do was win at all costs. I wasn’t being mean to people necessarily, but I was just a poor loser with everything. In conversations, I was a poor loser. In sports, in whatever it may be. In relationships, I was a poor loser. If I didn’t get it my way where I thought I was right, just a poor loser. I wasn’t intentionally trying to be mean or anything, but it was just in my body.
And it was this—I would say the ego was the second most powerful fuel that drove me to achieve results in the outer world, but it left me feeling so alone and empty in my inner world. And at 30, I started to transform and I’m still transforming everyday, but I started to open up about these things and realize, “Wow, collaboration and lifting others up is the key, not competition and trying to beat everyone.”
KYLE CEASE: That’s amazing.
LEWIS HOWES: And collaboration and lifting others up is the most powerful fuel over I need to be right all the time and I’m going to prove these people wrong.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. And isn’t that amazing that it’s all down to trauma, feeling that trauma once more. And I believe in this year and next year, I believe that consciousness is expanding to a level where these things cannot be seen. It’s almost like our consciousness is bigger, so it’s like looking and rooting around in our bodies. Like what you just described, like becoming number one to not feel that, I believe that was at one point the collective highest consciousness in the ‘80s, ‘90s. We didn’t look at our deepest, darkest things.
LEWIS HOWES: Maybe even right now, it is. Kind of politics. Who knows?
KYLE CEASE: And so the old movement, this kind of what the book’s about, is the old way kind of shows in the ’80s, there was this thing to have nine Lamborghinis and everything was about hype and get [INAUDIBLE] you’re like [INAUDIBLE] and everyone wanted to be the young Donald Trump, that book of selling and all this. And then the secret came and it said, “Focus on what you do want. Positivity, right?” What I believe is the consciousness is bigger now, and instead of only focusing on what you want, I really believe the amount of what you can get is based solely on how much you can accept the opposite. So in other words—
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] the opposite of what?
KYLE CEASE: So let’s say you really want to be rich, it’s based on how willing you are to be poor.
LEWIS HOWES: Wow.
KYLE CEASE: If you want the ultimate relationship, it’s based on how willing you are to be alone. If you can love being alone, you’ll cry out your codependncy, you’ll cry out the old story, and then you’ll create a space for that. But if everyone is ambitiously just trying to date, there are going to be two attachments that are stopping each other from their inner truths so it won’t land, it won’t last. And it goes all the way, too. You want the best life, totally accept death. To have the greatest life in the world, be completely and fully accepting of death. And the more you go, “I’m fine with death,” the more you feel free. It’s weird because what we have now is a world of people who are really trying to put a million locks on the doors and protect themselves from a life they’re not living. Like, “Okay, I got to protect. I got to keep my freedom. I got to have all the weapons, I got to have all these stuff.” That’s nice. Do what you need to do, but are you living it? Because the weirdly the more you live your life fully, the less fear you have of death.
LEWIS HOWES: Not obsessing over every lock and booby trap in your house and security systems or whatever. I’m not saying you should have security systems, but yeah.
KYLE CEASE: But what if, ironically—what I find is the more you live and accept your darkness, like your strength is based on how much you accept what you call your darkness. So I’m sitting here and I meditate and in the meditation, light and dark show up at the same time and who am I if I’m looking at both? So I’m sitting here holding space for light and darkness, so I’m now the space that can carry both. Usually, we’re avoiding our darkness so we just have this capacity. Just positivity, no negativity. But I’m like, “What if we got this?” So you’re sitting here and the more you accept your darkness, the more people aren’t going to screw with you because they’re scared of theirs. People that we perceive as some of the most dangerous, manipulative, narcissistic people are actually ironically horrified of their own darkness. So when you’re shining a light and when you’re fine with all your truth and you’re fine with everything, that scares the shit out of the manipulators. So you start to get divinely protected the more you open your heart.
See, most people think, “I’m scared I’ll get hurt,” so they close their hearts off and ironically, they close their hearts of to the most loving people in the moment right now. But what they actually attract are other people with closed hearts. So people pleasers got their heart closed and they only attract takers. If you’re a people pleaser, you’re scared, you don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings, the takers see right through that.
LEWIS HOWES: They take everything from you. Constantly.
KYLE CEASE: Because that’s the match to what you’re being. So if you open your heart, you’re like, “I’m scared I’ll get hurt.” Actually, you’re getting hurt because you’re not opening it. So life is trying to give us a ton of [BEEP], but we’ve never seen what life’s like when we’re not constantly scared of our own darkness and achieving to avoid it. When you just sit there and love yourself, and I don’t mean like confess everything to the world. So that means make a million videos and tell the world. It’s like, I’m talking—
LEWIS HOWES: Be vulnerable every moment, every [INAUDIBLE] do this.
KYLE CEASE: So you’re like doing that and now that’s your addiction. Like, “Look, everybody.”
LEWIS HOWES: You get validated from that. I’ve seen that story, too.
KYLE CEASE: I’m talking you working through your stuff and the biggest power you have is your own forgiveness, not for any reason other than to free you in that. And then just completely forgiveness of others.
LEWIS HOWES: So [INAUDIBLE]. Forgiveness is everything. So many people don’t forgive themselves for the longest times.
KYLE CEASE: Well, guilt is a great way to stay the same. The things you feel guilty about keep you actually in the same grade. It’s almost like, let’s say you’re emotionally in third grade and then you did something you feel bad about, so now you feel guilty. Well, guilt keeps you in third grade because it’s a way to stay the small story. Forgiveness moves you to fourth grade so you become someone who would never do the thing anymore. So by staying guilty, you’re actually staying in the vibration and your own repression of yourself is going to cause you to lash out at other things and do more of the same, because you’ve put your own prison on yourself that says you can’t and then that inside part of you goes “screw you” to that. You get what I’m saying?
LEWIS HOWES: We keep repeating the pattern. So how long should we guilty for, or should we never feel—like we did something, we’re like, “Okay, reflect on that. I know that wasn’t the right thing.”
KYLE CEASE: That’s a good point. There can be the narcissistic other sides. “It’s fine that I did that, it’s fine that I—” Well, what I like—one of the things for me about meditation is that it transforms the old story. It’s almost like going to the bathroom everyday emotionally.
LEWIS HOWES: Just releasing those emotional bowls.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. And the funny thing is, most people, when they meditate, they’re scared of what’s coming up and that’s the equivalent of going to the bathroom for the very first time after forty years and being scared to do this because you think you’re the poop. You’re like, “This stuff’s coming out. That’s me leaving.” No, no, no. You’re the butt. You’re the space that’s leaving and you don’t have to force it, you don’t have to do it fast. It’s exactly the same. All you have to do is sit and wait and then the first day, if you didn’t crap for forty years, the first day is going to be a nightmare. So when people meditate, [INAUDIBLE].
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] flow out.
KYLE CEASE: They cry and cry and they release all this and it’s insane. But then, eventually, it’s down to good hour there.
LEWIS HOWES: But you need that emotional diarrhea, for maybe a week, a full 48 hours or a week.
KYLE CEASE: That’s the thing, is what I’m trying to teach people. You’re the butt, not the poop.
LEWIS HOWES: Now, we’re supposed to be talking more about money.
KYLE CEASE: Are you tearing up?
LEWIS HOWES: No, I’m just laughing. I’m laughing. I was actually [INAUDIBLE]. I’ve been crying a lot this year.
KYLE CEASE: Hell yeah.
LEWIS HOWES: This relationship I’m in, I’m just like, she just does something and I’m just like, “Oh my god, I feel so much loved because I’m allowing myself to receive it.” I’m finally being like—I was in these relationships that I was choosing after my last relationship ended, and it didn’t end in a good way. I really woke up. I was like, “Okay. I’ve been in so many relationships that have ended horribly.” Like something bad has happened, almost every ending. [INAUDIBLE] one relationship wasn’t that bad, but the rest were bad in the last 15 years. [INAUDIBLE] okay, the common denominator, this is me, so let me reflect on who I’ve been, what I’ve done, and why I created this in my life. This pattern. I decided to look at all the relationships I’ve been and what they all had in common, and they had three key things in common. I’m sure they had more, but it came down to three. I was like, “Oh, wow. This is a big ‘aha’ moment.” The first one is, I thought that they were extremely beautiful, like I was attracted to them physically. Sexually, I was attracted. Second thing, they have some type of gift or talent that I was inspired by. “Wow, this is like this amazing gift that they [INAUDIBLE].”
KYLE CEASE: I get that.
LEWIS HOWES: The third thing in my perception is I didn’t believe they were beautiful and they didn’t believe their talent.
KYLE CEASE: So you could coach them.
LEWIS HOWES: I could coach them. And I was like, “But look at this. You’re amazing, you’re beautiful. You’re so gifted and talented. I want you to see this.”
KYLE CEASE: [INAUDIBLE] Not believe it?
LEWIS HOWES: She definitely had like—
KYLE CEASE: Something shut off or [INAUDIBLE] stuff?
LEWIS HOWES: She was suppressed for sure, because she [INAUDIBLE] older brother when she was 19 [INAUDIBLE] started working and left school to be a mom fulltime and have three more kids. [INAUDIBLE] her voice.
KYLE CEASE: So one of the things that cause me to coach people was my mom was a very big, open-hearted person. Also though, my mom had a cynicism a lot in my life about what I do. I mean, she just loved me for real, not just based on what I accomplish. But I’m like, “Mom, look. Look how funny this joke is. And look how—” And she kind of [INAUDIBLE] so I found myself attracted to cynical women for a while. The ones that my ego could re-date so I could overcome my mom’s approval. So I’m actually looking for the sabotage, and what I believe your tears are for this relationship are the releasing of the story of who you used to be in relationships and even the child you used to be. This is a different story. This is a person that isn’t necessarily repressing themselves or someone that you need to coach.
LEWIS HOWES: No. I want to coach her with anything. It’s just like magic.
KYLE CEASE: So who would you be without the coacher? Who would you be without hat? And our identity that we create is like I coached my mom. [INAUDIBLE] You get what I’m saying?
LEWIS HOWES: I know.
KYLE CEASE: So what I believe the tears are, as both of course a profound appreciation for this moment, but I actually believe almost all of our tears from just working with so many people and seeing this is the actual goodbye to a part of what you thought you used to be.
LEWIS HOWES: An old identity.
KYLE CEASE: So you actually go, “My dad told me XYZ so I tried to achieve to get my dad’s love.” And then you finally meditate enough or you do enough work and you see through that, and then you make a decision that doesn’t support that old story. Now the old story’s not being seen and catered to as true, so there’s no use for it so it comes out your eyes. And everytime I work with someone, I go, “What’d happen if you didn’t have that?” I worked with someone recently that loves to protest things and goes to the Senate and protest things that they feel are injustice and I said—what I felt with her was she’s amazing in the highest vibration of her, she’s a lover. But in her entire life, she’s been the fixer and the fighter. She’s protected herself from a lot of dangerous things in her life, so she created a false identity that she is the fighter. But when I meet her, she’s this amazing [INAUDIBLE] feminine energy that’s so sweet. And so she realized, it would actually be a higher service to the world and even against the injustice going on for her to go to her loving state, because that is freeing her old story, which could free other stories including the people doing the repressing. We could use 10 million Mr. Rogers more than 10 million marchers around the—you know what I’m saying?
LEWIS HOWES: Sure.
KYLE CEASE: That’s what’ll heal when we can cry out our stuff.
LEWIS HOWES: It’s crazy.
KYLE CEASE: I was saying to you, even though there’s a lot of stuff that Ben Shapiro says that’s amazing—
LEWIS HOWES: Facts don’t care about your feelings.
KYLE CEASE: Facts don’t care about your feelings which has a truth to it, and my new revelation is also feelings don’t care about your facts.
LEWIS HOWES: True.
KYLE CEASE: Your feelings inside want to be seen and we are going to have a problem in the world if we don’t see our feelings, because all anger is repressed feelings. All anger, and it’s under the illusion that’s something over there. Everything that you think is outside of you, [BEEP]. It’s an unseen inner child. And these feelings try to come up and then you try to analyze it or figure it out and bring a bunch of facts and while your feelings don’t care about your facts.
LEWIS HOWES: True. [INAUDIBLE] probably.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah, both [INAUDIBLE] are true.
LEWIS HOWES: Your feelings maybe don’t care or don’t matter to certain laws at some point, but they matter. [INAUDIBLE]
KYLE CEASE: They both matter because—
LEWIS HOWES: They matter to feel them right now.
KYLE CEASE: Facts are based on feelings and feelings are based on facts. They both aren’t [INAUDIBLE] equally.
LEWIS HOWES: That’s true.
KYLE CEASE: We got to be able to cry stuff out, we got to be able to—we’re carrying around like the ‘50s in our body.
LEWIS HOWES: That’s crazy, man. Probably way before that, yeah.
KYLE CEASE: So once you cry that out, how much more do you think would come to you? Because you’re receptive and not moving from the small story.
LEWIS HOWES: So much abundance. It’s been crazy, man. It’s been weird, like there’s a lot of shifts [INAUDIBLE] happening since I let go of the story. Now, granted, I’m always a work in progress. There’s still going to be stuff—one of the things [INAUDIBLE] about me is—my close friends know this. Anytime where I’m not meditating consistently and I’m not being [INAUDIBLE] and being like freedom and peace and love, and I feel someone’s taking advantage of me, I react. I go back to the child who was sexually abused or bullied or made fun. And I’m like, “I need to protect myself. I need to express my dominance,” whatever it is. [INAUDIBLE] I always regret it and I’m like, “God, why was I such an idiot?”
KYLE CEASE: “Why didn’t I meditate?”
LEWIS HOWES: Exactly. Why was I reactive? Like this is nonsense, this [INAUDIBLE] matter in a week or a month or a year. I was like holding on to so strongly that someone was attacking me. Or my ego or whatever it was.
KYLE CEASE: Because one thing’s meditation truly does and I’m talking about just listening to silence. It doesn’t have to be that you focus on your breath. It’s just like sitting and listening, all these stuff comes up. But one of the things that does is it causes you to realize who you are is now not the sexual abuse story, as horrific as it is, and it’s honoured and seen and held by you now is not you.
LEWIS HOWES: Exactly.
KYLE CEASE: It’s not you. [INAUDIBLE]. It’s an old story and as we sit here and realize that we’re here, then that won’t be triggered. And the more you see your triggers, the more they leave. And when they leave, no one can trigger you.
LEWIS HOWES: That’s true.
KYLE CEASE: Because they can only trigger your triggers.
LEWIS HOWES: And everytime you’re triggered, you’re saying someone else has power over me. Like you said, everytime we react, comment negatively or gossip, we’re giving our power away to that thing.
KYLE CEASE: One of the things that people do that I think is really funny is when we tell people about what are triggers are to change them. “Just so you know when you ate that away, I was triggered. It reminds me of my dad. So if you could not eat that way.” That’s called narcissism. Like everyone move around my trigger.
LEWIS HOWES: Crazy.
KYLE CEASE: I don’t want to look at my [BEEP], so expect everyone to not hit this. That’s what narcissism is. Someone who’s scared of their own repression, someone who’s scared of their own abuse. So when you open your heart, it’s a whole different story. It’s so funny because as this book is about money, it’s like you can see how much more abundance would you have, how many different types of jobs or entrepreneurial things would you create from that space. So as much is it’s a book about money, it’s a book you. But I believe that’s the highest way to money, so [INAUDIBLE] few people [INAUDIBLE] book about money, and then you read this [INAUDIBLE]. It’s like you will not make money just from a bunch of strategies anymore. Just hearing manipulative tactics—
DITO AKO NAG STOP!!!!!!!!
LEWIS HOWES: Or you could make money but it’s not [INAUDIBLE] money you’re making, and you’re going to lose it or you’re going to be a prisoner to it.
KYLE CEASE: But it’s also now not sustainable because we can see through such [BEEP] now that the more you sell from manipulation, the only one type of person that can’t see that is going to get it. And you’re going to get a bunch of refunds because it wasn’t your heart. What’s going to make money is authenticity. The universe working through you, doing something that’s in contribution to the world for real. I have a rule that everything I do has to be a win, win, win. I’ll explain that. A win is abundance for me and a fulfilment from doing it. The second win is, are they fulfilled, abundant, and more conscious? And third is the world better because of it. So when I look at a soda company, that’s a win, lose, lose. It’s a win because you make money, lose because they’re rotting their teeth and getting diabetes, and a loss because you’re throwing plastic in the ocean. So that paradigm is going to fall because all three wins are inside of you. So if you’re a win, lose, lose, your 2/3 self-hate, because it’s in you. You get what I’m saying?
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah, of course.
KYLE CEASE: So win, win, win has to be happening so [INAUDIBLE] there’s the consciousness of the world expand. It’s ironic because things that have been seen as [INAUDIBLE] or whatever are actually the most legitimate [BEEP]. Meanwhile, soda and other crap—
LEWIS HOWES: Credible companies like [INAUDIBLE]
KYLE CEASE: You’re an amazing company, thanks for selling such a legitimate addiction to the world. Tooth rotting, crazy, horrible vibration lowering—are you kidding me? That’s okay? You know what I’m saying? That’s the cult.
LEWIS HOWES: My challenge is I’m like, “Gosh, I love pizza and ice cream so much.” When I was younger [INAUDIBLE], “[INAUDIBLE] be so cool to have a pizza shop or ice cream store.” But I’m like, “God, that would just be hurting people.” So I need to reinvent like what pizza [INAUDIBLE] so it’s healthy and reinvent ice cream so it’s healthier.
KYLE CEASE: And it’s also possible the reason you like ice cream and pizza, not that it’s not awesome, it’s because you liked it as a kid.
LEWIS HOWES: Absolutely. Probably joy.
KYLE CEASE: When I was a kid, we had a place and we still do in Washington, called Taco Time. It was like a really good, like an amazing version of Taco Bell, but I used to go there with my mom.
LEWIS HOWES: It made you feel a certain way.
KYLE CEASE: So I don’t like Taco Time as much as I like connection with my mom. So when I stopped going to Taco Time, I cried for some reason. I was like—but I’m crying my mom out. I’m crying my old story out.
LEWIS HOWES: In Delaware, Ohio there’s like an ice cream stand. I can’t remember what it’s called, something [INAUDIBLE] but it was [INAUDIBLE] ice cream my dad and I would always get it after, like a T-Ball, baseball game. It made me feel connected to him.
KYLE CEASE: I get that. And then I often unconsciously want to do it with my daughter, too. I want to do the pattern with her. I learned music from my parents. I’m a musician in certain ways, but I still love [INAUDIBLE], Huey Lewis [INAUDIBLE] because I do love the music, but I also really love the connection that I, the perceive I’m getting. But the more you do the work, the more you see how crazy that is.
LEWIS HOWES: It’s a story over and over.
KYLE CEASE: You’re like, “I just want to feel my dad loves me, so I’m going to play this Huey Lewis album.”
LEWIS HOWES: It’s to create that feeling.
KYLE CEASE: But isn’t that interesting, once we become aware of that, once we hit the awareness of that, then it becomes insanity to keep doing it. So once you see, wow. This is one of the stuff—things meditation brings up. I can see the pattern that’s chasing that thing so I can get a good job from my dad or doesn’t want to be abandoned again by my mom. Or doesn’t want to be last in sports. Or doesn’t—
LEWIS HOWES: Be laughed at or made fun of whatever it is. Rejected.
KYLE CEASE: I’m scared of the trauma I felt, so I’m going to do it again. Imagine if the other option is, we see and hold a space for the trauma and you now could be the parent that you always wanted. You now could be the parent for the inner child that didn’t feel safe in the past. That’s what I do. Whatever it feels, it goes, “I feel unseen.” I sit there and go—instead of me going, “Well, let’s get you seen,” that’s the ‘80s response.
LEWIS HOWES: We tell a joke. We [INAUDIBLE] people laugh at me and yeah. whatever it may be.
KYLE CEASE: I tell the inner child—like imagine you’re meditating. It goes, “I feel unseen. I feel unloved.” And you think it’s because about [INAUDIBLE] but take off the reason, I just feel unseen. I feel unloved. And you close your eyes and you’re saying to it instead of fixing it or getting it loved, say, “You’re allowed to be unloved in my body. I’m going to be the first place that lets it fine if you’re unloved in my—” Then you feel this five year old you for real like dance around your body because it’s finally seen. Because usually when you feel unseen, you chase being seen to fix it and keep not seeing it. It wants to be seen by you, not the girl. Not our parents.
LEWIS HOWES: The world or social media.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. It wants to be seen by you, so everytime you chase being seen, it’s feeling ignored by you. So our job is to become a space to see it. And the second you go, “I feel unseen,” and it’s okay, you can feel unseen in my body. It will move through your body, it will go just over arm, whatever. And the more you go, [INAUDIBLE] you’re almost loving it as it does that, it’ll start breaking into pieces and it will come out of your eyes.
LEWIS HOWES: In tears, he’s saying. Not actual little child jumping out of your [INAUDIBLE]
KYLE CEASE: No, it’s not. Yeah, that’s so horrifying.
LEWIS HOWES: You know [INAUDIBLE] so fascinating, we were talking about—
KYLE CEASE: [INAUDIBLE]
LEWIS HOWES: I love this stuff. I mentioned that I’ve been working on a new book. It’s still in the early stages. I’m writing the proposal and fleshing out the ideas and it’s about eliminating self-doubt. Because I believe that self-doubt is the silent killer of all of our big dreams and when we can eliminate the self-doubt, we can do what we’ve been talking about this whole time. [INAUDIBLE] chase the R project or start singing or whatever we want to do. We can start fully doing it without the fear of being, embarrassed, broke, alone, whatever it may be. And my entire life since I was probably fourteen till now, everytime I feel fear of something, I get sick and tired of feeling that way after a certain point. Maybe it’s a few years, maybe it’s a few months, maybe it’s decades.
I’m like, I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired of this feeling of people judging me or people criticizing me about this, so I go all in on the fear. For instance, when I was a teenager, I was afraid to talk to girls. It’s why I created a challenge with myself in the summer when I was sixteen that everytime I felt butterflies when I saw a girl, I was going to go over them and just have a conversation. It was terrifying the first week. But I was like, “I’m sick and tired of feeling rejected all the time and feeling like girls are making fun of me and laughing at me all the time.” Or just not having the confidence to go up and talk to someone. So I did this and by the end of the summer, I was just like so free to talk to anyone and it didn’t matter if they rejected me or not. I had so many good instances of just great conversations with people that I felt bulletproof, I felt invincible(CHECK) by the end of the summer. I did that with salsa dancing, with singing on stage when I was terrified of singing, public speaking. I did that for [INAUDIBLE] year of being rejected over and over again. Those feelings in my body until they went away and I continue to do that in business, in relationships, and it makes me feel free of the fears, of insecurity, of judgment that people have on me.
KYLE CEASE: You know partly why? It’s because you’ve now created an excitement to the fear so you want it there so it can’t be there. The only thing that causes fear is not wanting it there. The only thing that causes fear is you not wanting it to be there. If you love fear, it can’t last because fear is your resistance to yourself.
LEWIS HOWES: Oh, that’s big.
KYLE CEASE: So it’s only the factor. It’s not that you’re in fear, it’s that we are trying to get rid of it, if [INAUDIBLE] trying to change it, it’s that we think it shouldn’t be there. But life is so cool that it’s trying to get you to learn to love more unconditionally, to even create a capacity to even love that fear, which you have.
LEWIS HOWES: Why do we resist fear so much in general?
KYLE CEASE: Because we believe we’re the old story and the fear that’s showing up is perceivably bigger than the old story, but it’s not bigger than what you are. So to the old story, this is bigger. So I actually have a belief—this is my conclusion. But it’s based on what I’ve seen [INAUDIBLE], with working with a lot of people. What I believe more and more, my definition, there’s no science behind this, there’s no whatever, but this is what I’m experiencing is that trauma seems to me like something happens that’s bigger than you can handle. Let’s say you’re in 1st grade, let’s say you’re literally in 1st grade. Something happens and it’s almost like that thing is a 12th grade thing but you’re a first grader. Now when you’re actually in 1st grade, you understand there’s calculus but you don’t get what it is.
LEWIS HOWES: You don’t start taking a class.
KYLE CEASE: So in the same way the body goes, “I know that’s there, but I don’t get what it is so I’m going to store it somewhere.” And we’ll learn it when we’re in 12th grade. And we’ll learn it also emotionally in 12th grade. So you’re in 1st grade and you got this one, you’re in 2nd grade, 3rd grade. It’s not bringing it up. 4th grade, 5th grade, 6th grade, 7th grade, 8th grade. You start learning more lessons from life, you’re changing, you’re going through different emotions, different relationships, different careers, whatever. You finally get to 11th grade and it’s like, “Oh, you’re ready for this.” Now your capacity is open and I’m going to show you this thing and now that your capacity is so big, we’re going to release it. And when you see the trauma show up in meditations and stuff like that, it’s only because it’s leaving. See, people see something show up in their meditation and they go, “What do I do with this?” Well, it’s coming up because it’s leaving. You don’t have to do anything with it. So it’s almost like when a dentist is pulling out your old cavity, you’re going to see it because it’s leaving your mouth. But imagine if when you saw it and it’s leaving you and, “What does this mean? What do I do with this?”
LEWIS HOWES: You’re afraid to let it go, you put it back in.
KYLE CEASE: So now you’re analyzing it and trying to figure it out keeps it there. So what if you just let it be there, it shows up, there’s your grandpa yelling at you [INAUDIBLE] some old story, trauma, whatever, and you just don’t do anything. This is what my meditations are. They’ll just be like, “Boom, there’s some trauma. There’s a thing.” Why is it showing up? Because I have access to capacity with this moment that’s big enough to be able to see it. And be able to handle it and it won’t be overwhelming for me. And what fear is trying to do is get you to be a bigger capacity of oneness. Fear is trying to take you to [INAUDIBLE] here because fear is only death to your story.
If someone threatens you and that means you might lose your job, you think who you are is that job, that’s why it’s scary. The person in my relationship might leave me. I feel fear because I’m under the illusion that who I am is the story and this person feels just like my mom, so I’m under the illusion that I’m going to lose love for my mom during this break-up.” But when you actually [INAUDIBLE] you this moment, the less fear you have. And you study this moment, you really not only transcend the fear, but your capacity is so big that you can receive bigger. You can move bigger, you can do—the same party that can transcend the fear can now accept bigger ideas and do bigger things because you’re not the small story, you’re infinite. You and I are equally infinite. Everyone in here, you’re infinite. The people watching. You are. I don’t care what the story is. And when you come up with “yeah, but”, that’s your marriage to the old story.
LEWIS HOWES: How are we able to overcome our fears? If we feel crippled by our fear?
KYLE CEASE: By loving it. First of all, wanting it to be there. And it’s going to transcend in a way that your ego is not used to doing. So the fear comes up. Do you have one right now? We could do it if you want.
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] addressing a lot of my fears in the last seven months. One getting out of an old relationship, feeling under attack from opinions of others, [INAUDIBLE] break up and what happened [INAUDIBLE]. “Is this true, is that true.” The gossip of the break up and being like, “Man, everyone’s got an opinion.”
KYLE CEASE: Look at everyone giving you their power.
LEWIS HOWES: Everyone. Oh, they were? And they’re spending so much time and energy thinking and obsessing about something that is not there.
KYLE CEASE: You weren’t supposed to do what they expected of you. You’re supposed to be within the boundaries of people who have no idea who you are, and you’re not supposed to follow your calling, you’re supposed to follow what they say. Isn’t that nuts?
LEWIS HOWES: Crazy.
KYLE CEASE: But when it triggers you—
LEWIS HOWES: So it triggered me for a little bit because it was just an avalanche of people. I was like, “Woah, This is—okay. that’s a lot coming out from me.”
KYLE CEASE: So if someone were to write something now, you find something, some exposé or whatever in this world of exposés, what would you feel right now?
LEWIS HOWES: I would feel sad. I would feel sad that people put that much attention on something that’s so far in the past.
KYLE CEASE: What about your unseen part of you?
LEWIS HOWES: Personally?
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. Because if there’s a trigger that’s—
LEWIS HOWES: If I’m being honest with myself, I’d probably be like, “God, these people have no clue who I am” for a moment.
KYLE CEASE: Yes. So you feel unseen.
LEWIS HOWES: They don’t know the truth, they don’t know—yeah, I feel like they don’t care. They’re just assuming something and they’re holding onto that story.
KYLE CEASE: So one of the first things that’s trying to happen is life is so cool that it’s trying to get you to find and be a space for all the unseen parts of you so you can do even more and be even bigger, because none of what they said actually affects you. It affects whatever lingering old story in your childhood that you’re holding on to. So if I just said, “Okay, some huge article came out.” You had some giant whatever, scandal because you broke up, whatever.” What would you feel? What would be the words? Unseen, unloved?
LEWIS HOWES: I would feel like—so there’s an article made up or just someone’s opinion about whatever [INAUDIBLE] I’d feel under attack.
KYLE CEASE: What was the last trigger—
LEWIS HOWES: I’d feel like under attack. Abused.
KYLE CEASE: Abused?
LEWIS HOWES: I would be like, “This person’s abusing me. They don’t even know what happened.”
KYLE CEASE: And that’s interesting. It’s such a different word, like I would feel unseen. You’d feel abused.
LEWIS HOWES: I’d feel abused if someone’s trying to take advantage of me.
KYLE CEASE: So if we take of that—
LEWIS HOWES: I’d feel used as well. I’d feel like, “Man, this person’s using me to get attention.” My ex was using me for five years. In a relationship and she’s still using me to gain life significance and attention or the other [INAUDIBLE] or whatever. I’d feel used and abused.
KYLE CEASE: So if we just take off the reasons now and just [INAUDIBLE] stuck with abused that you just feel in your body abused. Can you, first of all, try this? Take a deep breath because that reminds you you’re here to be a space for abused.
LEWIS HOWES: I feel abused.
KYLE CEASE: It’s not like I want you to feel abused, but it’s more like, okay. So we said the word “abused”. Now if you take the reason off like someone wrote it, now you’re alone with abuse. With the feeling of abused. And that usually shows up like a lump sensation or do you feel anything in your body that just—
LEWIS HOWES: It’s right here.
KYLE CEASE: It’s right here in your chest. Excellent. So I want you to be a space for it. There’s a part of you—
LEWIS HOWES: What do you mean “be a space”?
KYLE CEASE: So you, right here, are holding space like you’re a bed for a five year old version of you that feels abused. Do you get what I’m saying?
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah, yeah, yeah. [INAUDIBLE]
KYLE CEASE: So take a deep breath. So it’s almost like you’re letting it be there. I don’t want you to do anything to try to get rid of it—
LEWIS HOWES: Hold it there.
KYLE CEASE: It’s not hold it, but don’t try to do anything with it. Like imagine it’s your five year old son.
LEWIS HOWES: Inside of me?
KYLE CEASE: Inside of you, just needing to be seen and not fixed and not changed. You get what I’m saying? You’re the space for this, so we’re not trying to get rid of it. We invite it here. It’s totally allowed here. Dude, you’re so heroic to do this work right now. This boy that feels abused is here, and you’re like the dad that’s a space and says, “Your strength is just being okay with it being there, not needing it to go anywhere, not trying to do this to get rid of it. You actually are creating a higher capacity that’s both the space, the body.” That’s all three: the space, the body, and the five year old. So first of all, you’re loving the abused boy, not trying to fix it. You feel that? What’s the sensation feel like now?
LEWIS HOWES: I feel like heat. Like my heart is beating stronger and I feel like heat right here, yeah.
KYLE CEASE: So take a deep breath again because that’s [INAUDIBLE] to hear. And this is deep. I’m offering everyone watching to do this with themselves because you just go, “I feel unseen.” Whether it’s by your spouse or whatever, unseen, unloved. Now you’ll notice the more you want it there, it might move around. Do you get what I’m saying? If you want the heat there, you’ll notice what usually you do, our habit, is to kind of fix the heat, overcome the heat.
LEWIS HOWES: Disperse the heat or [INAUDIBLE].
KYLE CEASE: Yeah, yeah. But instead, you are even stronger than the heat, so you’re the space for the heat. So what are you feeling now?
LEWIS HOWES: I feel like [INAUDIBLING] relaxing a little bit.
KYLE CEASE: Relaxed. Did go into your stomach, too?
LEWIS HOWES: This feels like less.
KYLE CEASE: It feels like less.
LEWIS HOWES: It feels less.
KYLE CEASE: Excellent. Weirdly, as you accept it, it starts to kind of go away because you’re creating a deeper capacity by connecting to the moment to be there for it. So I’ll keep checking in. What do you feel now? Because it kind of does different things. It kind of moves into your stomach—
LEWIS HOWES: It feels like it’s going down a little bit.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. The reason [INAUDIBLE] I’m connecting with you heart-to-heart and I felt it going to my stomach, that’s why I asked. It’s like I felt my stomach feel it, because we [INAUDIBLE] from our stories, we can actually feel each other heart-to-heart. So I’m holding space and capacity for the abused boy, too, and we’re just collectively like two men regular [INAUDIBLE].
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] inner child inside of us.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. So you’re creating the space because the articles or whatever was written was not you feeling unseen by them, it’s you feeling unseen by you. And now you’re seeing you. And this vulnerability right now and imagine, you’ve never ever got to see what you’re able to create and what you’re able to do with the world after this child seen. Because once this is fully seen and a part of you and accept it, what you’re going to do will be the first time you did it without the resistance to a part of yourself. You’ve never seen what that’s like, you’ve never seen you without this there. So it’s almost like a lingering thing that was just kind of dangling to the side. It’s like, okay, that’s what triggers are for. To show us where we don’t love ourselves.
LEWIS HOWES: God, that’s so true.
KYLE CEASE: So everytime I work with someone, I get their trigger and like, “Let’s go there. Let’s take off the reason.” Because some things [INAUDIBLE] trigger. How could someone else do something? If someone said you’re a purple monster, that wouldn’t trigger you. You’re just like, “They’re nuts.” So some things, if they trigger you, that’s not a sign about them. That’s a sign that you didn’t love something about yourself. So now, who are you? What do you feel right now? And the deep breaths kind of remind you that you’re here so you don’t get caught in the story, you’re just the dad for this five year old child.
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah, I just feel like it keeps it keeps kind of going down and lessening.
KYLE CEASE: Lessening?
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah.
KYLE CEASE: And you feel a teeny bit more here or stronger or less triggered?
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah, I do. I feel more peace.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah, because it needed to be seen. This is [BLEEP] that we can do in five minutes that we carry around with us our whole lives. So now you’re sitting here, feeling relaxed and you’re okay with a part of you that feels abused. Again that you had not ever felt that level.
LEWIS HOWES: So it’s not trying to disregard the feeling, it’s first accepting it [INAUDIBLE] being the space for the feeling, holding the feeling. I guess gently holding it, don’t clench it, but hold it gently and allow it to move where it’s going to move and then move on. It’s at the next—
KYLE CEASE: Check this out. The victim tries to run from the feeling. Maybe a [INAUDIBLE] to it. It’s getting [INAUDIBLE] addiction that block me [INAUDIBLE]—
LEWIS HOWES: Smoking, drinking or whatever.
KYLE CEASE: The achiever overcomes the feeling while it’s still unseen.
LEWIS HOWES: Right. And it’s always there, you’re just never looking at it.
KYLE CEASE: Yes.
LEWIS HOWES: You’re going to create and achieve and make money and accomplishments. That was my life.
KYLE CEASE: Yes. It comes out and you go, “That’s my driver.”
LEWIS HOWES: Yes, it was.
KYLE CEASE: So that’s nice. That’s a better one than victim, but it’s still an unseen kid. Now, imagine if that kid was a neighbor’s kid coming up to you and saying, “I feel abused.” Would you go, “Well. we better achieve—we’re going to overcome this. Let’s create a new book, whatever.” You’d go, “Come here, let me give you a hug. I hear that you feel abused, let me hug you. Let me hear you.” That’s what it needs, not “let’s accomplish a new—” Let’s just be with it. And then what happens? Once that’s now accepted and a part of you, as you said, it goes away. It goes away. Sometimes it’ll go away through crying, sometimes it goes away through diarrhea, it goes away through. Because when you release that—
LEWIS HOWES: Throwing up, whatever. Yeah.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah, a little less fight or flight of your body so the [INAUDIBLE] is not holding us tight, constantly at war, not wanting to be abused again in 2019. Again when you were five. Like craziness. This is the one thing that if we started doing this, there would be so much change in the world. There would be so much shifting because all lashing out, all civil war, all anger, all Democrat versus Republican, [INAUDIBLE], gun violence is all boom. Abused, not seen. And then you become intellectual, and then you become strategy, and there’s no source in you.
LEWIS HOWES: The vulnerability. It’s one of the reasons why I’m after doing this work on myself six years ago and constantly doing the work. I realized I had so much more freedom than ever before. I couldn’t sleep. It would take me at least an hour minimum to go to bed until I hit thirty years old.
KYLE CEASE: Wow.
LEWIS HOWES: Almost through my childhood, teens, twenties, I would just be up thinking and anxious, stressed. Like, “Ugh. Am I enough?” Whatever it is. Strategy, strategy, strategy.
KYLE CEASE: Well, and sleep’s a great example of something that you can’t achieve. In fact, achievement gets in the way. “I’m going to sleep tonight” and it’s never going to work. So how do you finally get sleep, not need sleep? Not need it to happen, not force it?
LEWIS HOWES: Surrendering.
KYLE CEASE: What if sleep is telling you this is how the world works? Don’t achieve your way through. Be in surrender and watch how life gives you what you want. Because the more people try to achieve sleep, the more they don’t sleep.
LEWIS HOWES: That’s right.
KYLE CEASE: And the more you’re in surrender and actually focused—We do this meditation retreats. Everyone in our meditation retreat, we have amazing sleep because you have four, five hours. We do all this content, meditate, we find all these inner kids that cry them out. We’re listening to silence, no phones. I mean, they put their phones in an envelope. They have the phone but they don’t open it, then they just go out. You have no internet, you just go to sleep and everyone is happier and happier.
LEWIS HOWES: Connected, yeah.
KYLE CEASE: By day four or five, everyone’s switching careers.
LEWIS HOWES: Everyone’s getting married or getting divorced.
KYLE CEASE: Totally.
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] feel like I’m either all in or I’m out.
KYLE CEASE: Or, you know what I see a lot of? Is people that at first, they get to date, too and realize that relationship doesn’t align. They keep going day three, day four. And then the relationship suddenly changes to them. There’s a lot of people that get to date, too. “My husband’s not for me, whatever.” But then they get more to an acceptance and then they get to day six, turn on their phones and I’m not kidding. Their husband wrote them like, “Hey, I threw out our TV. I’m ready to change my life.” It’s almost like a magical match to—we’ve never seen life without this unseen child completely stuck in us. We have no idea what life is. We’ve all been in this giant “don’t beat me again, dad” life.
LEWIS HOWES: “Don’t judge me again, don’t scold me again.”
KYLE CEASE: I mean, we’re missing out on life. Now, people go, “That’s great, but how do you make money?” If you are fully on the highest vibration, do you understand how much more valuable you are than money? And how much more—remember, Buddhist monks, there’s millionaire achievers that go to Buddhist monks all the time. The reverse never happens. There’s no Buddhist monks going [INAUDIBLE].
LEWIS HOWES: “I need to make millions.”
KYLE CEASE: Why is that? Because the highest thing we have, the number one asset we have is our connection to ourself. Then most of us think it’s money, so we make that the highest vibration but it’s not.
LEWIS HOWES: Inner peace.
KYLE CEASE: It’s inner peace. It’s this moment and you have that available. The best things in life are free is a very cliché sense, but it’s true. And that’s true, but also we only pay attention to what we invest in financially, so we overlook meditating here. But if we could pay to meditate, we’d all of a sudden do it. So we have to understand that what is free for real will bring in everything else than you want. I have a rule, too, with money that you might think is cool. This is a thing that I want to offer people. If you’re trying to figure out how do we create a space for money, I offer people to think about how they think about money. Think about how unconsciously we think about it. Like you’re never enough, you’re the root of all evil, whatever. Now picture your money on a date with you. And if you’re on a date with a person who says, “You’re never enough, you’re the root of all evil,” you’d never want to be there. Well, money doesn’t want to be in the vibration of something that’s judging you.
LEWIS HOWES: You reject that person, so you’re rejecting money. You think they—
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. I’m going to use you to get someone to like me. I’m going—this is how money is seen. So how could money show up if that’s how you see it? Because you wouldn’t stay with someone on a date that said you’re never enough. You’re the root of all evil. You’re just like, “Okay.” So how would you like to be seen on a date? You’d like to be seen as “I love you no matter what. No matter if you’re small or big. If you’re off or on, if you’re feeling like [bleep], I love you all the way.” And if you can look at your debt or have one dollar in the bank and go, “I love you,” now you’re creating a vibrational space for it to show up because you’re safe, because your focus is on money and how it needs to change. You’re much better off because you’re on how you’re going to change.
When you start changing like we just did and looking at these things and not needing to overcome as much as loving it, now you’re focused on the thing that actually creates the money. Remember, every dollar you’ve ever made came from you, so don’t get excited about money, get excited about you.
LEWIS HOWES: Zing.
KYLE CEASE: If I went on a hike with you, we get lost in the woods, I run the corner and not with you and we find the waterfall. I find it, you don’t see it. I fill the cup up with water and I come back and I say to you, “Dude, a cup of water.” What am I not showing you? I’m showing you the small thing—
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah, not the waterfall.
KYLE CEASE: Not where it came from.
LEWIS HOWES: The source.
KYLE CEASE: The source of the water is the much more important thing, so none of us look at the source of where money came from. We look at the money. So you’re sitting here, dwelling—not you—but people that were dwelling on the cup of water.
LEWIS HOWES: Not us being the source of creating more.
KYLE CEASE: Every dollar you’ve ever made came from you, get excited about you. Start the focus on what you are, not what money will give you.
LEWIS HOWES: And your energy is going to attract or repel more wealth. A mentor of mine said—I was at a salsa club, learning how to salsa dance, terrified out of my mind and I saw a guy who was amazing. Who was a public speaker. He actually got me into public speaking and he said, “The world makes room for passionate people.” I think money is attracted to passionate people as well because people are passionate about life. They bring in energy, they bring a richness, a fullness, a richness and they attract riches. Whether it’d be through the community or the art that they’re creating or the business that they’re creating, and you’re going to start to attract—
KYLE CEASE: Especially in this time because I know there’s people watching this go, “What do you say about all the greedy billionaires” and blah, blah, blah. And what I say is that’s the old consciousness. In fact, we see through it and it’s starting to crumble. So the old way of doing things selfish was a conscious shift because I believe in like the ‘50s, everyone was just a factory worker working for and none of it was like a breakaway where an entrepreneurial boom happens. So taking your focus off of the old story and moving into what you are and learning how your thinking changes things was the highest consciousness we understood at the time. So at that time that created this old consciousness, your focus changes it so you think positive whatever, and that created it and we keep going and take a good thing too far and then all of a sudden it’s this billionaire thing.
You can feel the most controlling mindset crumbling, you can feel the suicides from the people that have made lots of money but see it’s not the answer. You can see the people that are controlling other people. All the control as the control fell in you during this interview, as you said goodbye to the old story and kind of loved it, all control in the world is starting to fall. And the old structures aren’t working and what will work in the new century, in the new future is the birth of this consciousness. This consciousness, following your heart, you will not be able to make money just from massive achievement. It won’t work. I’m telling you, it’s going to be—we see through it, the consciousness sees through it. It’s too small. When there’s going to be a major influx of Martin Luther Kings, Mr. Rogers, Oprahs, Wayne Dyers, it’s coming because we’re so repressed that our hearts are going to springboard. Like the renaissance and their [INAUDIBLE]. You know what I’m saying?
LEWIS HOWES: That’s true. You mentioned this a couple of times and it reminded me of another mentor of mine, Chris Hawker. I was working as an intern for him for about six months when I was in my sister’s couch broke, no money. My dad had just caught into an accident, a car accident that left him in a coma for three months and he was kind of my safety net. He was my financial stability where he would support me financially on things and he always said, “When you’re done living your dream and chasing your football career, whatever it is, [INAUDIBLE] come work for me.” He had an insurance company, life insurance. And I did the whole insurance internship and did the testing and I almost failed three times in getting my—whatever it is, like the serious something, whatever.
The life insurance test that I had to pass so I could sell life insurance. I should’ve stopped after I failed the first time because I just knew it wasn’t for me, but I did it so I could have this backup plan. And so my dad got in his accident, he had to sell his company to his partner because he was no longer able to work anymore and I didn’t have the financial stability like I had before. So I was sleeping on my sister’s couch for a year and a half and I was working as an intern for about six months with someone that I was learning a lot from. And I remember at one point being like, “Man, I just really want some money.” I feel like I’ve been working hard for a few years, I really could use some money. I’m not paying any rent, money at my sister’s. I feel like a loser because I can’t contribute to her, I can’t even get my own apartment. I’m just a loser.
I was 24 at the time, I was like, “Man, I’m just a loser of a guy.” And he said something to me that what you said. He said, “Money comes to you when you’re ready for it.” And I was like, “I feel really ready. I could really use the money right now.” And he goes—
KYLE CEASE: I didn’t say desperate for it.
LEWIS HOWES: Exactly. He didn’t say that but he was like, “It’s going to come to you when you’re ready for it and when it starts to come, it’s going to make sense.” I was like, “Gosh, I just want it, though. I just want it right now.” And it’s funny because maybe a year later, it started to come. And then it started to really come pretty quickly, like six months [INAUDIBLE] after that. And I remember reflecting a year and a half prior, I was like, “Nah, I wasn’t ready for this.” If this would’ve came two years prior, I would’ve blown it. I would’ve been scared of it. I wouldn’t have been prepared for it. I would’ve been so freaked out, but the numbers in my bank out, I would have sabotaged it, probably. And so I really feel like it comes to you when you are prepared and ready, and sometimes it’s not when you want it to be.
KYLE CEASE: And when people say how do you get prepared and ready—
LEWIS HOWES: That’s the key.
KYLE CEASE: For me, meditation gets me to understand that I’m the abundance, not money. And the second you understand that you’re the abundance and I mean [INAUDIBLE] understand it in your nervous system. I mean, don’t just hear that sentence while you’re still dying for it in your body. Like really be in the alignment of understanding that I’m the abundance. Wayne Dyer said beautifully, “There’s a thing that everyone thought. That you attract what you want. And Wayne Dyer said, “You don’t attract what you want, you attract what you are.” What you’re in vibration of. So if you want abundance, you need to get to a place where you understand your abundance. And everything comes into your life the second you finally don’t want it. It’s not don’t want it like avoiding, like you don’t need it.
LEWIS HOWES: You’re not desperate, yeah.
KYLE CEASE: The second you stop looking for it, you don’t even remember you wanted it. That’s because you have to access the fulfilment of the connection to yourself first. And then weirdly, it’s going to create, first of all, so many creative things. But you’re going to just start—first of all, you’re so aware that you see things differently. Think of just—just the—when someone’s in their head, they’re walking on the street on their phone worrying. You could pass a hundred dollar bill and not even see it. But when you’re not in your head, you suddenly start to see all these dots connecting and everything meaning something different, and you see every moment as meaningful. Like last night, I was waiting to go into a restaurant. One guy recognized me and said hi and we created a friendship because he’s also a musician. That’s cool. And then this four year old girl comes in and just sees me and starts dancing in front of me and showing me her toys. That moment was so much cooler than if I was looking through, wondering what was going on in politics. That was fulfilling, that moment. And because that’s fulfilling and on my way to the table, each step is fulfilling. Now this is more fulfilling than anything I perceive could come to me to make me happy.
Once you actually have practiced understanding that this moment is more important than anything you think you want, now you are abundance, not money. Once you’re abundance, it’s impossible for it to not come. You’re just going to start feeling safe to everybody. They’re going to want to hire you, you’re going to get bizarre offers. They’ll just say, “Can you help me through something? Can you create this thing?” You’ll get in an alignment with your creative gifts more than your [INAUDIBLE] gifts to make money. You’ll be in this higher thing, you’ll be worth more. Better jobs will start asking you, you’ll start to actually feel heavy when million dollar offers are coming in because you’re like, “Even that I don’t want.” And then everytime I say no to something, even if it’s a huge thing, the bigger thing comes up. It’s like life’s like, “How about this, how about this?” And then the only question I ask is this, “Does this expand me or contract me?”
LEWIS HOWES: Oh yeah, that’s good.
KYLE CEASE: If it expands me, then I say, “Yes.” And I can feel that within two seconds. If I get to a pros and cons list, I’m already in contracting. Do you get what I’m saying?
LEWIS HOWES: Wow.
KYLE CEASE: So a way that I always give an example is if you’ve ever had lunch, if you’ve ever had lunch plans with someone and then you hope that they cancel—
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah.
KYLE CEASE: Okay. That’s your highest saying cancel. But you’re used to living a notch below it, so you wait for them to do it. So that’s what I’m talking about, is the highest what expands me. So expands, you know what expands me a lot is saying no to a lot of things.
LEWIS HOWES: That’s so powerful.
KYLE CEASE: Saying no like—
LEWIS HOWES: One of the hardest things to learn how to do, but then it’s one of the most freeing things when you’re in that space.
KYLE CEASE: Because there’s times where you might think, “My highest is to go out and get laid or party.” But it’s actually like really, sometimes my high is to go to bed early. Really, my high like—it’s not our highest to do what we’re doing. Is it your highest to go on Facebook a hundred times a day?
LEWIS HOWES: No.
KYLE CEASE: No, but we still do it. So we live second highest and we miss out on the universe. So for me, it expands me to be in alignment with the universe in that moment.
LEWIS HOWES: How important is developing skills and value? There’s one thing [INAUDIBLE] being abundance and being acceptance and all these things, but there’s another thing of like the person still doesn’t have any skills that are valuable for someone else to give them money. You got what I mean?
KYLE CEASE: So, want a crazy answer here?
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah.
KYLE CEASE: That’s a belief that they need the skills. So let me explain that. So let’s first of all talk about value.
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] perceived, right?
KYLE CEASE: Sure. And most people think value is what their worth is based on what’s in the bank. You can say that person’s got a net worth of 20 million, whatever. Cool. That’s nice. But there’s some people that could lose that money and remake it again in ten minutes. Like Tina Turner. If her bank account get robbed tomorrow, could just go on tour and fill it again. Then there’s some people who inherited it or won the lottery. And if that went away, they’re still not valuable at that moment, at least. So what’s the cause of value? Is it how much money you have? Or is it what’s under it and what you understand is under it? The factor of value is do you understand how valuable you are?
LEWIS HOWES: How do you understand how valuable you are?
KYLE CEASE: By creating the evidence of it, whether it’s through leaps. So for me, when I started saying no to really tempting things, it would be really hard that moment. Like [INAUDIBLE] hard. I remember when I was like no dating for six months and then the Swedish bikini teams. Like even us and be like, “Ugh.”
LEWIS HOWES: Be like, “No.”
KYLE CEASE: [INAUDIBLE] But when you start saying no, it might be hell in that moment. But the next day you wake up and you’re like, “Now even I’m someone that can say no to that. I am elevating myself above that temptation.” So if I’m somebody who can say no to that, you feel the force in that? So that’s one thing. So there’s a lot of skills, I believe, that we might need. But if they aren’t your highest to do them, they’re not a ten. And if they’re not a ten, that affects all of what you do. My friend Glenn Morshower says, “If you pee in a part of the pool, you pee in all the pool.” So my company, my job and my company is to do this, is to go onstage, is to coach people, is to be the space to cowrite the book, to make the movie.
I don’t do the account. I have no idea how to do the accounting. I don’t give a shit about the accounting. I don’t do the wardrobe, I don’t do any of that. But there are people [INAUDIBLE] to do that, so I delegate that. Because if I did this thing that’s a three energetically, then I’m going to average and bring that on to the stage. My energy will be more depleted because I’m doing things in my life that are like that. Same thing if you’re out of alignment in whatever area, you’re bringing that into all of it. You get what I’m saying?
LEWIS HOWES: So true.
KYLE CEASE: That’s my answer to the skills thing because there’s stuff that we’re just natural at. And most of us disqualify what we’re naturally good at because it hasn’t been done before. They go, “Why would anyone want to stay with it?” Because that thing you have is new, that thing you have is calling to you. And it might not make sense now, but I have so many people that I’ve worked with that are like, “Well, one thing I’m passionate about is this, but I can’t seem to stop the second part. The “yeah, buts”, the old story. This thing you just said feels good to my body.” Well, yeah, but no one will make money. No, you’re using the past story. Literally what this is, what we are is the universe trying to change the planet through you. The universe is trying to change itself to a higher consciousness through you. That’s what’s happening.
When we receive on a higher level, it’s like higher level ideas come through. So when you meditate or whatever, you have an insight that’s higher. That insight, you go, it’s exciting, but you can’t make sense. You can’t wrap your mind around it. Follow it. You’re not supposed to wrap your mind around it. One thing people say is, “I can’t wrap my mind around it.” You’re not here to shove the infinite vastness of what you are into your teeny mind. You’re here to acclimate your mind to the vastness of what you are, that’s the difference. There’s so many quotes that people say to insult people that live in their hearts, like this person went off the deep end. The implication is the shallow end is better. This person went over their head. Yeah, I’m using my whole body.
LEWIS HOWES: Right. I’m not staying in my head.
KYLE CEASE: Are you out of your mind? You better believe it, I’m in my heart.
LEWIS HOWES: Exactly.
KYLE CEASE: It’s easier done than said. How about “it’s too big for your britches”? How about we change pants and adjust to me versus me shoving myself in my old britches? What are we, twenties? These old quotes that are [BLEEP]. Every insulting quote, if you just reverse it, it’s so funny how dumb it looks. “Oh, dude, you’re out of your mind.” You’re right, you’re in your head. It’s like you’re thinking small. You better be out of your mind. I love to go over my head so I have to use my body. Just my small mind can’t grasp these concepts we’re talking about, but my body knows it. If you listen to this, you have to be listening from your body. You cannot listen from these small story. In fact, this is very offensive to the small story. How dare he? I’m in this limitation and most of us, instead of fighting for our freedom, fight for our limitation.
LEWIS HOWES: Think about the safe space. It’s safer being limited.
KYLE CEASE: Totally. Ironically, it’s not. It’s actually the most dangerous place.
LEWIS HOWES: But it seems safer. We’re more comfortable in that place.
KYLE CEASE: What we call a safe place could be an abusive relationship, it could be—it’s just you’re used to it. So because you didn’t die, you go that safety. And everything that I’ve never seen before, I don’t know that I won’t die, so my body is scared of it. But the truth is, usually what the body’s got is way better and it will change your consciousness from here to here, and then you’ll get this new calling once you’re here to here. And you start moving up versus forward motivationally, you start moving in this different way.
LEWIS HOWES: Levitating.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. What do you think of this [BEEP]?
LEWIS HOWES: I love this, man.
KYLE CEASE: Is this crazy?
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] couple of hours and I’ve been keeping track of time. We’re so infatuated by this.
KYLE CEASE: This is such a calling for me and I’m so in a belief that we could create really rapid change immediately. If we would start seeing our feelings, follow the vibrational callings versus what you think you have to do based on the small story. The amount of change on this planet that can happen in like a week is so nuts. It moves exponentially, so when you’re looking ahead and going, “What’s going to happen next year?” You’re not including all of this [BLEEP] we’re talking about and you don’t know how many possibilities are going to birth themselves really quickly.
If you’re sitting here going, “How am I going to pay rent in two months?” You’re backwards. In two months, do you know how much [BLEEP] you can do? From this place versus from the small stories, visions of what it can see? It’s crazy. I went nuts on this one, I hope you’ll like it.
LEWIS HOWES: I love it, man, This is great. Your book is out, The Illusion of Money: Why Chasing Money Is Stopping You from Receiving It. We probably spent 10% of the time talking about money and 90% of the time talking about the work it takes to actually start receiving it.
KYLE CEASE: Yes. Because that’s—
LEWIS HOWES: It’s everything.
KYLE CEASE: That’s the factor.
LEWIS HOWES: That is the stuff.
KYLE CEASE: And by the way, we have a thing right now where if you order the book on anything and you go to our website, I have a movie–
LEWIS HOWES: What website?
KYLE CEASE: My website’s kylecease.com or also evolvingoutloud.com. But right now, we have a movie that we’ve made and it’s about this. I’m here to birth a new consciousness. And we all are.
LEWIS HOWES: The movie’s free if they buy the book?
KYLE CEASE: If they get the book, you can literally go on Barnes & Noble or Amazon, get the book, grab the order number, go to my website, put the order number in, and right now, you’ll have the movie. Like right now.
LEWIS HOWES: The movie’s all about—I saw the trailer for it and I want to watch it tonight. [INAUDIBLE] case studies of people who have these stories. The stories [INAUDIBLE] tell themselves for years they grew up in and the feelings attached to these stories and what’s keeping people down from abundance of money. [INAUDIBLE] understanding.
KYLE CEASE: There’s several different stories, including my story in there and a lot of my talking. Gorgeous, beautiful nature shots and a reminder of what’s really real and these people that have these stories that did what they thought they needed to do to make money. I better become a lawyer because I don’t want to experience what my mom experienced in her childhood and that makes money. So there’s a person that has that story, there’s another person who had a good job at Wall Street then other person had a good job [INAUDIBLE] making money.
And then they did this thing where the girl, this woman, Sharon, she was at the law firm and not happy, but she started eating really healthy and felt so good that she started getting really high vibrational, feeling good, raw vegan type of food. So she started making it for everyone in the firm and they all felt good. And it started being so fun for her that she couldn’t wait to get home to go do that, so she realized that’s her passion. And now she’s more abundant, but every second she’s in—she talks like I do. I’m so excited about this. This is how we want to live. We can all live happy.
LEWIS HOWES: Alive, not dead.
KYLE CEASE: Alive. You don’t have to be yesterday ever again. You can start now. Just close your eyes and meditate for a couple of hours, it will clear that [BEEP] out. I mean, you don’t have to live in the stressful—
LEWIS HOWES: Anxious–
KYLE CEASE: Story. It’s a story. You’re making your story your God versus God your god versus the universe, versus the moment.
LEWIS HOWES: Well, I want to acknowledge you for a moment because you spent 22 years as a comedian, pursuing a dream, living the dream that you wanted to live. And then you decided that that wasn’t as fulfilling anymore for you and instead of saying, “Well, I’ve put 22 years of my life in this. This is my identity, I need to stick it out because look at all the work I’ve done, look at the credibility I have. In other words, it was success. I can’t just stop and go do something else.” You did. You transitioned into something else and used that 22 years of skills into something else, to help people with your events, with your meditation retreats, with your books. And then you transitioned even more into another topic of money, which some people might be like, “You’re a comedian. Why are you talking about money?” But I think you have a lot of wisdom around this from your experience.
KYLE CEASE: In the comedy, too. [INAUDIBLE]
LEWIS HOWES: Exactly, exactly. So I acknowledge you for constantly reinventing yourself, pursing ideas.
KYLE CEASE: Thank you.
LEWIS HOWES: Pursuing challenges [INAUDIBLE] people might say, “Stay in your lane. Go be the funny guy.”
KYLE CEASE: I love how that’s my lane. Like what I did is—I’ll say that it’s funny to say that one thing that you pointed out is this thing. “If you’ve done it for a long time…” I hear that so much. I paid this much so far to go to this school. Even though it’s not my passion anymore, I should keep going. Okay, let me ask you this. Let’s say you paid for a plane ticket to go from here to France and in one hour, it starts going down and you have a parachute available. Should you say, “I paid for the whole flight” and stay on the plane?
LEWIS HOWES: Yeah, no. You should jump out.
KYLE CEASE: You need to get out of the plane, and our old story is often a plane going down. And one of the reasons we stress is we’re attached to the old story. Your story is trying to die everyday, and if you understood you’re the moment, then you can be a space for the old story to be pulled from you. If the old story is what you think you are, you’re going to go down with it. Now, I have a theory that’s really crazy. There’s a way that I see this. In a lot of cases when a doctor tells someone you have six months to live, I believe that’s your old story. In a lot of cases. Because sometimes, they’re saying if you eat different, but then you go, “Well, who I am is someone who eats meat.” So, no.
LEWIS HOWES: Or addicted to sugar.
KYLE CEASE: Yes. So you will go down with the story because you’re saying that, but that’s an opportunity to meet a new story. And a lot of times, our old stories are the sickness, the pain, all of that. So if you have someone tell you something like that, try a new way of eating, try a new way of living. And it’s ironic because a lot of times when people hear that, now they got nothing to lose so they live fully. We see the greatest [INAUDIBLE] of them, they’re free, they cry, they release. There’s many stories where that prognosis was wrong and they lived a lot longer.
LEWIS HOWES: They heal. They heal themselves.
KYLE CEASE: They heal. Just so you know, the only reason we stress is because we don’t embrace death. And everyday, parts of our stories are trying to die. I mean, our skin cells are doing this [BLEEP] all day. Could you imagine if it thought you were yesterday’s skin cells? So you’re like packing it on your face. Death is part of life and the ore you embrace death, the more life you get. Because a ton of your old stories are trying to die. And if you just chill and let it, it’s just like in the old relationship might be trying to die and the old story of who you were with your mother is trying to die, and the old job is trying to die. If we aren’t holding on, there’s no tree that grabs its leaves in the fall and go, “This is me.” [INAUDIBLE] for your leaves. You couldn’t make new leaves, no new apples—
LEWIS HOWES: No new fruit.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. Crazy, right?
LEWIS HOWES: Well, two years ago, you were on the show and I asked you this question about the three truths and I don’t know if you remember them. I don’t remember them, but I’m assuming something new will come from you because two years ago, he’s dead and now you’re a new person. So you might have some new insights.
KYLE CEASE: And my weight is different.
LEWIS HOWES: And you’re much thinner.
KYLE CEASE: I’ve lost like fifty pounds.
LEWIS HOWES: I know, you look amazing, man.
KYLE CEASE: And it’s from this, it was not as much changing diet as much as it’s the old story’s trying to die and the byproduct of letting it die was I didn’t mean to eat to feel connection to my mom. So once that died, I didn’t have the addiction to food because it was an addiction that [INAUDIBLE] mom and connection.
LEWIS HOWES: Powerful.
KYLE CEASE: What were the questions?
LEWIS HOWES: So imagine—this is called the Three Truths. So imagine it’s your last day on earth, in the physical space and–
KYLE CEASE: I do everyday.
LEWIS HOWES: There you go. But imagine it’s many years away you want it to be, you’re a hundred whatever.
KYLE CEASE: 162.
LEWIS HOWES: 162 and it’s the last day. You finally got to switch out the lights in your physical space and you move on to some other space. And you’ve created everything you want to create, you’ve reinvented yourself every few years, written out the books, movies, whatever you want to do, you’ve done it. But you’ve got to take it all with you, all the content you’ve created, all the art, [INAUDIBLE] work, it’s got to go with you so no one has access to your work anymore.
KYLE CEASE: Oh, [BLEEP]. Okay.
LEWIS HOWES: But you have a piece of paper and a pen, or you have a stone that you get to chisel in three things you know to be true about. All the lessons of your life that you would want to leave behind for us, [INAUDIBLE] these lessons, these principles to live by. What would you say are your three truths?
KYLE CEASE: You’re enough right now, no question. When you let go of something, you’re only stressed because your mind can measure what you will lose. It can’t see what you’ll gain.
LEWIS HOWES: I like that a lot.
KYLE CEASE: And the feeling is never wrong. The feeling is never wrong.
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] write it down.
KYLE CEASE: When you’re letting go of something, the only reason you’re stressing is your mind can measure what you will lose, but it can’t see what you will gain. That’s actually something my friend, Diego, said to me when we were working together. He actually said that sentence and I was like, “Should I let go of my Facebook?” And he said that. I didn’t let go of my Facebook at that time, but I thought that was profound and let go of a ton of other things.
LEWIS HOWES: Wow.
KYLE CEASE: I now this week actually let go of my Twitter. I let someone else run my Twitter and [INAUDIBLE]
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE] is it?
KYLE CEASE: It’s like [BEEP] is getting magic. It was like Sunday and today’s what, Thursday? I’ve been in heaven because it also weirdly made me not interested in the news and it made me not interested in anything. It stopped my Facebook and Instagram, too. It was just like, there’s so much liberation in not check—I’m used to scroll on Twitter and do this thing. I don’t care. We aren’t supposed to know everything else going on.
LEWIS HOWES: That’s a lot of information.
KYLE CEASE: That’s a lot of suitcases we don’t need. Oh, okay, that happened there, and this is happening in this country and this politician’s… what am I doing? I’m not doing anything with the information.
LEWIS HOWES: Just holding onto it.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah.
LEWIS HOWES: Keeping it in your mind as supposed to having space or create or love or be.
KYLE CEASE: And how much creativity and income are we not able to bring in because 90% of our days filled with just facts of nothing? Who gives a [BLEEP]?
LEWIS HOWES: That’s true.
KYLE CEASE: I’m sorry, but that happened. But in the old days, we weren’t all informed of every area in the world and that probably, by the way, the informing of everybody is repressing us so much as creating more of the problem in the first place. Everyone is full of suitcases, so they’re mad and then they’re lashing out on each other. But like, yes, connect to you, it’s so much cooler.
LEWIS HOWES: So much cooler. The Illusion of Money: Why Chasing Money Is Stopping You from Receiving It. This is going to be a game changer. Make sure you pick up a few copies, check out the documentary. I really believe that when you stop chasing anything and you accept yourself like you said in number one, that’s when everything starts chasing you and you can start receiving it. Receiving love, receiving health, receiving happiness, joy, financial freedom, all these things.
KYLE CEASE: And one thing people say to me is, “So sit and do nothing and one unconscious belief is sitting on the couch, not watching TV, just sitting, listening to silence is doing nothing—it’s finally doing something.” You skirting around at a job you don’t like is doing nothing until we’re now connected to what we are. So to me, to sit for a while and listen for a couple hours, a few hours and don’t interrupt it, don’t do this in the middle of it. Go a couple hours, you’re not going to believe [INAUDIBLE]. You go a hundred days at a couple of hours a day, you’re free. You’re free, you’re abundant, it’s different. It’s different. You start cleaning out the crap in the attic, literally and figuratively.
LEWIS HOWES: Emotional attic and the physical attic, yeah.
KYLE CEASE: And I’ll say for people, this book is cheaper. It’s 19.95 and it will pay for itself over and over and over and over again, and it comes with the movie, too. So please, please, please get it. And I’m doing your summit.
LEWIS HOWES: I’m excited, man. It’s going to be amazing.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah. I can’t wait, brother.
LEWIS HOWES: September 6th and 7th, Kyle will be there one of those days, so make sure you’re there. This is coming out probably that week, so.
KYLE CEASE: It is.
LEWIS HOWES: Get your last minute ticket. Come see Kyle, get a book there, get it signed by Kyle. First copies signed.
KYLE CEASE: And it’ll be a nice hardback. [INAUDIBLE] proof.
LEWIS HOWES: [INAUDIBLE]. It’s all good, it’s all good. Kyle, you’re the man. I love this. We got to do more of this stuff together. It’s been two years since you were on, so you got to come back on for the next book about health.
KYLE CEASE: Yeah.
LEWIS HOWES: Your next one is going to be about [INAUDIBLE] the physical way. [INAUDIBLE]. I love it, man. The final question for you is what’s your definition of greatness?
KYLE CEASE: Now. Just the now. Just the moment.
LEWIS HOWES: I love it, man.
KYLE CEASE: It’s the greatest thing ever.
LEWIS HOWES: You’re the man, Kyle.
KYLE CEASE: I love you, brother.
LEWIS HOWES: There you have it, my friends. I hope you learned how to attract wealth and believe in your worth in a strong, powerful way today. Lau Tzu said, “Because one believes in oneself, one doesn’t try to convince others. Because one is content with oneself, one doesn’t need others’ approval. Because one accepts oneself, the whole world accepts him or her.” You’ve got to learn accepting where you are, who you are, and where you’re at in your life. The more you start to accept and be okay with things the way you are, let go of the past, move on from those things that are holding you back. Then you can start to move forward and really progress in your life. You can start to master new skills, you can start to appreciate those things that come in your life, and you’ll start to attract what you want more. You’ll start to attract the relationship, the wealth, the money, the time. All those things will come when you soon start to accept who you are It seems like a challenge in the messiness, but it’s a simple concept and when you fully start to surrender through that, everything starts to flow to you as opposed to trying to force things so much. Trust me, I remember this and every new level that I try to reach when I try to force things, it doesn’t come as easily. But when I accept who I am and I’m okay without the thing, that’s when it starts to come to me.
So this is powerful, guys. I hope you enjoyed this one. If you did, be a champion, be a hero in someone’s life. Send them the text of this episode from Apple podcast or Spotify and just text one friend, just send one friend who you think could [INAUDIBLE] use this information to help them earn more, to help them have more confidence, to know their worth more, attract more wealth. Text one friend, put it in a WhatsApp group app and get feedback from people. “So hey, what did you guys think about this episode?” Please leave us a review. Go to Apple podcast right now. The more you leave a review—I don’t care if you love a one star or five star review. Just leave a review and share your comment. I can’t reply to it there, I can’t delete it so whatever you want to say, you can say it. I just want to see your feedback and see how we can continue to improve and add more value to your life.
So again, go to Apple podcast, leave a review, leave a rating. I love to hear your feedback. We share with our community, we share this with our internal team, and it helps us spread the message of greatness even more everytime you review.
Big thank you to our sponsor today, DoorDash. Again, I am a big fan of convenience. I love to save time and I love to have convenience in my life, and DoorDash does just that. They’ve got over 340,000 restaurants in 330 cities so if you want to get a healthy option or you want to splurge on that ice cream or pizza every now and then, then go to DoorDash for your meals. Again, $5 off when you download the DoorDash app and enter the promo code “GREATNESS” on your first order of $15 or more. Check it out right now, DoorDash on the App Store. Use the promo code “GREATNESS” for $5 off your first order over $15 or more.
And we’ve got Summit of Greatness. Two weeks away. Let’s go. This is going to be an incredible experience. Again, almost 2,000 people from around the world flying in for this powerful experience. Kyle Cease will be there. You can come, you can get his book, you can get it signed by him and it’s going to be an amazing experience, so make sure to come check it out. You’re going to have friends for life, don’t wait anymore. If you’re saying, “Ah, I’ll wait until next year. I’ll wait until I’m ready. I’ll wait until I get the finances, I’ll wait until I can get the time off.” Make it happen now. Life is now, and now is the time to start stepping into who you want to become. So go to summitofgreatness.com, check out what we have going on. We’ve got some other surprises that aren’t announced there. Check it out right now and I’ll see you in Columbus, Ohio at the Summit of Greatness.
I love you guys so very much. I hope you enjoyed this interview and this episode. I hope you enjoyed this content. Three times a week, we bring the greatness to your headphones, to your computer, to your phone, wherever you’re at listening in the world, we bring it to you. We’re also over on YouTube so go subscribe to our channel, Lewis Howes over on YouTube. Follow me on social media. I’m also on TikTok now, you can go to @lewis over on TikTok and follow me there if you’re using that app. But wherever you are, our mission is to help inspire you to give you the tools, the information, the resources to take your life to the next level. I love you very much. You know what time it is, it’s time to go out there and do something great.
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