A marriage can end over a bag of granola, a full year before anyone says the word divorce.
James Sexton, a divorce lawyer for over two decades, sat down with Lewis and told the story of a client whose husband always quietly restocked her favorite granola. One day the bag ran out and he never noticed. She knew right then that it was over.
He calls marriage a technology that fails about 53% of the time, and says most couples put more thought into the wedding cake than into what they are signing. In his book If You’re in My Office, It’s Already Too Late: A Divorce Lawyer’s Guide to Staying Together, he shares what works: send the hard email while the hurt is still small, and get a prenup even when you feel certain. He also explains why infidelity usually starts with lost connection long before anyone cheats.
The line I keep repeating to people: the opposite of love is indifference. And he still believes in marriage. He compares it to the lottery, where the prize is so good that it is worth buying a ticket.
You will finish this one wanting to do some small, kind thing for your partner tonight without asking for credit. If you care about relationships and honest communication, you will probably start a conversation you have been putting off.
If You’re In My Office, It’s Already Too Late: A Divorce Lawyer’s Guide to Staying Together
