How often to tell the people around you what you love about them?
Sometimes it feels easier to criticize. But this isn’t the path to creating an amazing team.
Even if it’s uncomfortable to tell people what they’re doing right, it’s important.
Like everything else, it’s a practice.
Practice acknowledging others, and own the acknowledgment given to you.
You’ll be amazed by how it changes your life.
For this 5-Minute Friday, I revisited a conversation I had with Chris Lee where he shared his strategies for empowering the people around you to shine by acknowledging their greatness.
Chris Lee has spent the last 27 years leading powerful Leadership Seminars around the world. A pioneer in emotional intelligence, Chris Lee has trained and developed people at the top of their game such as Olympic athletes, Fortune 500 Business leaders, celebrities and individuals with a desire to elevate themselves. Chris Lee also serves as a collaborator on TV and radio shows for Univision and The Fox Network.
Chris says that great leaders are star makers. They make everyone around them better.
Learn why it’s important to practice appreciation for the people around you and to receive gifts of praise on Episode 720.
Lewis Howes: This is 5-Minute Friday!!
Welcome, everyone, back to the show. I hope you guys are having a fantastic week, whichever day it is for you, and I am so excited about this episode. I’m bringing back Chris Lee, he’s a fan favourite.
Now for those who don’t know who Chris Lee is, if this is your first time here, he’s a transformation coach, leadership coach, and emotional intelligence trainer, and he’s been doing this work for well over 25 years. Hundreds of thousands of people around the world have gone through his trainings and helped take their life, their business, their relationships, to the next level.
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Chris Lee: Acknowledge the strengths that people have; let them know, give feedback; be verbal about it; appreciate, acknowledge, highlight. Highlight what people are doing right. Remind people of what is right about them.
I have a saying that I always say, “There’s so much right about you,” because as human beings, our tendency is to focus on what’s wrong. We look at our hair, don’t like it; we look at our body, don’t like it; we look at our results and we’re always conditioned to train ourselves what’s wrong.
“My ethnic background, my age, my financial status, my sexual preference,” we’re always in judgement of what’s wrong, and most of the time, when we communicate to our employees, it’s to correct them on something wrong.
How often do we say, “Hey! I just want to let you know that I appreciate you. I want to thank you for being so amazing.” You know, I’ve worked for so many companies, rarely have I had a boss who was in gratitude about what I was doing. Usually, it was ‘no comment’, until I messed up, then there was a comment about messing up.
Same thing in a relationship, very rarely do we – except in the beginning, in the beginning it’s ‘me too, me too, me too’. In the beginning it’s “You’re great.”
“So are you.”
“I love you.”
“I love you.”
But once the relationship is in that comfort zone, very rarely do people remind each other of what’s positive and what’s amazing about each other. And so, acknowledge people’s strengths, acknowledge your family members’ strengths, acknowledge your employees’ strengths, acknowledge each other’s strengths, assets, what you love about each other, what you appreciate about each other.
Gratitude will create stars around you.
Lewis Howes: I love it! What if somebody feels uncomfortable acknowledging someone? You know, a lot of times, I feel like, the reason they don’t is because they feel uncomfortable.
Chris Lee: Get over your ego.
Lewis Howes: Okay, perfect. There you go.
Chris Lee: Yeah, I mean, that’s all about you. If you’re going to be a star-maker, and you’re going to be a leader – because leaders are star-makers – you’ve got to get beyond whether it’s comfortable or not. Usually, things that are worthwhile are out of our comfort zone.
Lewis Howes: Right. People should be aware of this to receive when people do practice this, and when people do acknowledge. Because most of the the times, I see a lot of people who can’t look someone in the eyes when they are acknowledging them, or they’re looking down, or they’re saying, “No,” or they’re not accepting it and I think it’s just as equally powerful.
You taught me that this, is the power of receiving acknowledgement as well as giving.
Chris Lee: And owning it. Really owning it.
Lewis Howes: Yeah, and saying, “Thank you, I appreciate that, I receive that,” or, “Thanks for the acknowledgement.”
The Star Maker: Seven Strategies To Empower…
Chris Lee: The people around you and number one is to get over you own ego and insecurities. Number two, see possibilities and gift in others. Three, acknowledge the strengths and assets that people have, let them know what it is, appreciate them.
Number four, acknowledge people’s weaknesses and challenges. Number five, offer to coach and develop them, mentorship, emotional intelligence.
Lewis Howes: Education, yeah.
Chris Lee: Work with people to transform what they need to transform. Number six, pay it forward. Encourage the people in your life, on your team, to have that mindset of star-making. And number seven, practice it on a daily basis.
Rigour and do it your self, I think it’s important to let people know. And sometimes it’s not only hard to receive it, it’s a challenge to give it. Well, look, some of the ways we can practice it is, one thing is, with yourself, what you acknowledge and appreciate about yourself, because, being a star-maker, you get to create the star in you as well.
So, when the moment comes – I don’t necessarily say that every single day you have to saturate the people, “I love you!”
Lewis Howes: Because then it may not be authentic.
Chris Lee: Then it’s not real. Another thing is writing it.
Lewis Howes: Hand writing.
Chris Lee: Yeah, when was the last time you wrote someone a note appreciating them? So, yeah, writing a note, a gift, you know, giving someone a gift just because today is Tuesday and I want to give you a gift.
Why wait for a birthday? Why wait for a holiday? Give your boss a gift, you’ll blow him away. Or, as a boss, give a bonus to your employees, or give them a certificate for dinner. Just small little details, little gestures is a way to practice it.
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Lewis Howes: Hey, guys! If you enjoyed this inspirational clip from a past episode of the show, then you’ll love the free book I’m giving away right now. It’s called The Millionaire Morning. It includes some of my best tips for starting off your day with a millionaire mindset. Get your free copy at themillionairemorning.com and just pay shipping.
Again, check it out right now, themillionairemorning.com.