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Summit of Greatness 2024 | September 13-14 | Los Angeles, CA


Joel Osteen

Joel Osteen on Thriving in Relationships, Marriage and Love


Are you thriving in your relationship or marriage?

Relationships and marriages are often seen as the source of great happiness. However, they can also be the cause of so much unhappiness, sadness, and frustration. So, how do you know if you are thriving or simply surviving in your relationship or marriage? In order to have a healthy and thriving relationship, both partners need to be putting in the effort. It takes compromise, communication, and lots of patience.

Friends, our guest today is Joel Osteen, he’s the pastor of the largest church in America, the Lakewood Church. This is the second time we have had Joel on the show, so if you haven’t heard the first episode about having a strong mindset, make sure to check it out

In this episode, we discuss the biggest reason why it’s so hard to find meaningful relationships these days, the three things you and your partner have to be aligned with, the key to having a thriving marriage, and so much more!

I felt so inspired by our conversation and by Joel’s outlook on relationships, and I’m sure you’ll find valuable wisdom from him in this episode. So, buckle up, relax, and let the class begin.

Who Is Joel Osteen?

Aside from being the pastor of America’s largest church, Joel Osteen is one of the most popular inspirational figures in the U.S. He’s a New York Times best-selling author. One of his books,  Your Best Life Now, was on the New York Times bestseller’s list for more than 100 weeks and has sold more than 10 million copies in the U.S. to date. 

Joel’s father, John Osteen, is the founder of Lakewood Church, and following the passing of his father in October 1999, Joel took over and became the senior pastor. Under his leadership, the weekly attendance of Lakewood Church grew from an average of 5,000 to more than 50,000 until it became the largest church in the U.S. according to Outreach Magazine, Church Growth Today, and Forbes.

In 2003, the church acquired the home of the NBA’s Houston Rockets, the Compaq Center, and Joel spent the next 18 months renovating the auditorium to the tune of $105 million. In July 2005, the first of seven weekly worship services of Lakewood Church was held in the 16,000-seat auditorium, and within the year, the place became the most popular tourist destination in Houston, according to the Visitors Bureau and the Houston Convention.

Despite his busy and hectic schedule with the ministry, Joel has written over 12 books, and he’s published a new book called, You Are Stronger Than You Think, where he talks about how to unleash the power to go bigger and bolder and beyond your limits. But in this episode, we focused more on love, marriage, and finding meaningful relationships these days.

The Biggest Reason It’s Hard to Find Meaningful Relationships

We all want to find someone special to share our lives with — someone we can trust, depend on, and who will be there for us through thick and thin. But finding meaningful relationships is harder than it seems. Why is that? What makes relationships so difficult? And how can we make them work? 

“I think what happens sometimes is you get the stress of life … — you’re raising kids, and you’ve got bills to pay, and all of a sudden you don’t have any time to just breathe and have fun and laugh. … I think we can bring the stress from the outside into our relationships, … and I think you have to leave that stuff, the best you can, at the door and keep your home a place of peace and love.” – Joel Osteen

We can all agree that life is pretty stressful. Between work, family, and social obligations, it’s hard to find time for ourselves, and sometimes that stress bleeds over into our relationships. We start taking out our frustrations on the people closest to us instead of dealing with them head-on. 

But I don’t think that has to be the case. We can bring the stress from the outside into our relationships, but only if we want it to be there. We have a choice in how we let external factors affect our personal lives. So let’s make some good choices, and keep the stress where it belongs — out there.

While keeping our home a place of joy and love can help you maintain meaningful relationships, there are things that you and your partner need to agree on. 

“A blessing isn’t a blessing until it’s spoken.” @JoelOsteen  

The 3 Things You And Your Partner Need to Agree On

If you’re in a committed relationship, there are some key things you and your partner need to agree on. No one is perfect, and disagreements are bound to happen, but if you can at least agree on the important things that matter to both of you, your relationship should be in good shape. Joel shared with us his thoughts on the three things you and your partner should agree on:

Values And Faith

Do you have strong values and beliefs? If not, it may be time to find some. Values and faith play an essential role in our relationships. They provide a solid foundation and help us stay connected to what’s important in life. Without them, relationships can quickly fall apart.

“What are your values and faith? … Like me, I’m going to be a person that honors God, that’s going to live by scriptural principles. I’m not going to be perfect, but I think where we go in there … is just overall values.” – Joel Osteen

Values help us stay grounded in who we are, while faith provides us with the hope we need to move forward. Both give us strength during tough times. Together they provide a solid foundation on which to build a lasting relationship. So don’t neglect your values and faith — they can make all the difference in your relationships.

Your Passions and the Things You Are Excited About

If you’re like most people, you probably think that your passions and the things that make you excited have nothing to do with your relationships. After all, how could what you do for fun or what gets your heart racing possibly have any impact on anyone else? 

But actually, the things that make you happy and inspire you are essential in relationships. Here’s why: When you’re passionate about something, it radiates on those around you. You become a more positive person to be around.

“And then what are your passions, and what are you excited about? I think those are a couple [of things] that I would think of.” – Joel Osteen

It’s fun to be around someone who is passionate and interested in life! Their energy is contagious and can add a lot of positivity to any relationship. So always remember to keep doing what makes you happy, and let your passions be the driving force behind your relationships.

Aligning Your Goals 

Relationships are not always easy. It doesn’t matter what you’re looking for, there will be moments where it feels like your partner is the only person who understands you. These are often the moments that make relationships worth fighting for and keep them going strong. 

But sometimes life gets in the way of our goals, and we lose sight of what’s important to us. This can lead to resentment, unhappiness, or even worse — a breakup!  What if there was a way to make sure this never happened again? Aligning your goals with your partner is an easy step that could save your relationship from disaster.

“Another thing would be: Does the person have the drive that you want, or do they have too much drive? … Are your goals aligning?” – Joel Osteen

Relationships are about give-and-take. One person might be the breadwinner while the other may stay home with the kids. We all have our own responsibilities to tend to in life, but if you want your relationship to thrive, it’s important that both partners feel like they’re on the same level. Aligning your goals can help make this happen, which is why it’s an important step toward a thriving marriage.

The Key to Having a Thriving Marriage

There is no question that having a thriving marriage contributes greatly to a happy and fulfilling life. However, many couples don’t know where to start when it comes to creating a lasting and healthy relationship. Joel shares one aspect in his marriage with his wife, Victoria, that helps their relationship to thrive:

 “I do think one thing I should throw in here … is we’ve done our best to keep respect in the marriage because we are people and … we’re going to say things we shouldn’t. … [There will be] times that we feel offended or discouraged, but we’ve done our best to not say things that [are hurtful to each other]. … [So] I think [you have to] keep respect, and part of that was [acknowledging that] … sometimes we’ll just [have to] agree to disagree.” – Joel Osteen

Respect is essential in any relationship, and even more so in marriage. It is important to feel respected by your spouse and to respect your partner in return. Respect allows couples to feel safe and cherished. It builds trust and strengthens bonds. When spouses feel respected, they’re more likely to forgive each other and stay together through thick and thin. Respect allows for trust, communication, and intimacy to thrive. When respect is lacking in a marriage, it can be difficult for things to improve. 

Why You Should Listen to This Joel Osteen Podcast Episode Right Now…

Guys, this is such a powerful interview about relationships, marriage, and love with Joel Osteen. Listen to the full episode for more wisdom from him and don’t forget to share the episode with someone who you think needs to hear it. You could make a difference in someone’s life today.

Don’t forget to check the first part of our conversation on Episode 1180: How to Create Confidence and Abundance in All Areas of Your Life, where we discussed how to have confidence in yourself, how to deal with negative criticism, the biggest lessons Joel learned from his childhood, how to think abundantly in all areas of your life, how to overcome the feeling of imposter syndrome, and so much more. 

Follow Joel on social media. He’s on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Check out his website, as well, to learn more about Joel and his ministry. You can also request a copy of Joel: THE 2022 YEAR OF HOPE PLANNER at his website when you partner with Joel as a Champion of Hope.

I want to acknowledge Joel for spreading positivity to millions of people worldwide through his ministry. I appreciate how he’s encouraging people to find hope through God so they can overcome their personal struggles. His definition of greatness is worthy of remembering:

“My definition of greatness would be becoming all that God created you to be. So I think greatness is different for each one of us, but it’s just about reaching your full potential, just becoming what God created you to be taking the limits off of yourself and stepping up.” – Joel Osteen

What if you could be greater than your wildest dreams? What if there were no limits to what you could become? It is possible to take your life to a new level — to be all that God created you to be. You just have to start believing it’s possible and begin acting on it. This means stepping out in faith, even when you don’t feel ready. So start today by believing that greatness is within reach for you, and then take the next steps necessary to achieve it! 

I want to remind you all, if no one’s told you lately, that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. Do you know what time it is? It’s time to go out there and do something great.

To Greatness,

Lewis Howes - Signature

“You can call out the seeds of greatness in other people.” @JoelOsteen  

Some Questions I Ask:

  • When did you know that your wife was going to be your wife?
  • What do you love the most about your wife?
  • Do you have any daily non-negotiables in your marriage?

In this episode, you will learn:

  • The biggest reason it’s so hard to find meaningful relationships these days.
  • The 3 things you and your partner have to be aligned with.
  • The key to having a thriving marriage.
  • How to grow with your partner over the long-term.
  • Plus much more…
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Joel Osteen

Transcript of this Episode

Music Credits:


Kaibu by Killercats

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