Dr. Nicole LePera

Lewis welcomes Dr. Nicole LePera, renowned author of the #1 New York Times bestsellers “How To Do The Work” and “How to Meet Your Self” Workbook. Dr. LePera, the creator of the #SelfHealers movement, discusses her latest book, “How to Be the Love You Seek,” offering invaluable insights into healing relationships starting with oneself. She highlights the significance of understanding past traumas and how they shape current relationship dynamics, emphasizing the importance of self-love, emotional resilience, and cultivating healthy connections.

Relationships have always been essential to human survival. Our bodies and brains are programmed to seek out connection, whether familial, romantic, or platonic. And yet, these vital bonds are often at the root of our deepest suffering. While our hearts are primed for compassionate connection, our nervous systems—which store all our past hurts and disappointments—are wired for threat and negativity.

For decades, leading relationship advice has maintained that successful relationships require a specific compromise—that we must change our authentic expression to better meet the needs of others, and vice versa. It may sound reasonable in theory, but as Dr. LePera explains, this approach is nothing less than a recipe for a lifetime of resentment.

Buy her new book How to Be the Love You Seek: Break Cycles, Find Peace, and Heal Your Relationships